I wondered what microscopic pre-malignancies are
growing within me right now. I have certain habits that need careful
monitoring. I have a tendency toward despondency and anxiety. I can also be
obsessive-compulsive about many things. These predispositions are still
contained, manageable…in situ. As of now, they are imperceptible
irregularities, hardly noticeable compared to the bigger tumors that are
visible in others. If left unchecked, these predilections can become toxic
malignancies that take over my life.
Like
radon—which is an invisible poisonous carcinogen that is present in many
homes—evil works surreptitiously. This gradual sliding into decay is something
I notice within me and around me. I write about it frequently in an attempt to
remind myself and others of the danger. I know I’ve used several metaphors and
several blog posts to try to research and study this serious affliction. Yet, I
feel like I still haven’t figured out how to prevent it.
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