Swaddling

photo credit-http://blog.angryasianman.com/2012_08_01_archive.html

 

I recently saw a segment on TV about swaddling babies. Swaddling mimics a constricted environment, similar to the womb. It provides warmth and security and thus helps the baby stay calm. I remember wrapping my newborn like a burrito, all snug and tight. Some people just wrap a baby in a blanket loosely, with its arms hanging out. A properly swaddled baby can’t flail his arms around because everything is wrapped tightly in the blanket.

When I face a crisis, I automatically have the urge to flail around…not just my arms, but everything! The following cartoon describes me perfectly.

photo credit- http://www.nataliedee.com/

With anxiety comes the urge to fidget, to do something, to thrash around even when it’s unproductive. Not only does this just whip me into a frenzy, it’s also exhausting.

I crave to be swaddled in God’s comforting grace, held in His arms, tight against His chest…To be still, calm, at peace, knowing all shall be well…‘cuz-- He’s got this!

Blessings in Disguise

My favorite salad dressing is Golding Farms fat-free raspberry walnut vinaigrette. I used to buy it regularly at Walmart. For several months now, I haven’t been able to find it. I bought other raspberry vinaigrettes, but I didn’t like them. Every time I went to the grocery store, I checked to see if it was back. After weeks of disappointment, I finally concluded that they must have discontinued production of this item for some reason.

Yesterday I was at Walmart, passing by the salad dressing shelves, and there it was! One lonely jar of my salad dressing. I was ecstatic! I grabbed it and started searching behind it to see if there were more hidden in the back of the shelves. There were! Except all the other bottles had completely different packaging! The bottles were a new shape and the label was completely different. I would never have recognized them as my beloved salad dressing without this one old bottle sitting in front! I wondered if these bottles had been there for the last few months, and I had just overlooked them because they were not in the usual packaging.
 
At times, it’s hard to recognize blessings when they come in unusual packaging. Here are a few examples. An acquaintance of mine became a close friend only after we went through similar hardships. I would never have recognized our kinship, because she looks and acts completely differently than I do. When my husband and I moved to the Midwest, away from all that was familiar, we saw it as a time of trial. But now, in retrospect, we acknowledge that this was a blessing in disguise.

Certain life events, like weddings, births, graduations, etc., are easily categorized as blessings. Others, like moving to an unfamiliar place, a serious illness, unemployment, relationship troubles, etc., are seen as misfortunes. Every one of these life events involve struggle. There is as much pain in birth as there is in death, as much struggle in building a relationship as in ending one. Blessings often come packaged in pain, labeled as affliction.

Occasionally, these difficult circumstances cause us to turn away from God. This is what turns an affliction into a curse. However, if any of these struggles bring us closer to God, then ultimately, they become blessings.

Starling Murmurations

Yesterday, I saw a flock of starlings, also known as a starling murmuration. Their beautiful, aerial aerobatics are amazing to behold. In case you’ve never seen this, here is a link to a video of this phenomenon:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XH-groCeKbE&feature=related
The first 10 seconds are enough to give you an idea.

Although this is a common sight where I live, I pause every time I see a starling murmuration. Every autumn, I look forward to their mesmerizing dance. I wonder at how they move as one, how they are all connected. I can’t help but applaud the Choreographer who came up with this and all the other wonderful displays in nature.

“Keep your eyes open for God, watch for his works;
be alert for signs of his presence.” (Ps. 105:4 MSG)

I felt God’s presence as I watched the starlings. I also sensed His presence with my son, as he drove away, by himself, for the first time. I acknowledged God’s providence at the grocery store, as I paid for this week’s provisions for my family.

Yet, I can’t help but wonder why God allows some families to go hungry, some birds to be shot and killed for sport, or some children to be killed in car accidents or wars.

I keep my eyes, ears, and all my senses tuned into God, waiting for elucidation. He helps me realize that we allow our human family to go hungry. We shoot birds for sport. We decide that driving after a few drinks is perfectly fine, or that war is justified -- and sometimes, children die in the process.

God allows us to exist and move according to our own will. We must not hold Him responsible for our extemporaneous moves. Like the starlings, we too were choreographed to move as one, in step to the divine tempo, all of us connected to God.

Make it Work

Theodore Roosevelt is known for the saying: “Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.” This motto influenced his foreign policy. His administration negotiated diplomatically with foreign countries, while holding the threat of violence in reserve. While I’m not a huge fan of big-stick diplomacy, I have come up with my own version of this motto.

“Talk fast, and wear big earrings; it’ll distract others.”

Say what?? Yeah…I know it’s not quite as profound as Teddy’s quote, but it works for me. I have a variety of flaws. I compensate for most of them by the art of distraction.

I’ve always had a tendency to flit from one random thought to the next. Some people might mistake this for A.D.D., but I prefer to just call it quick thinking. I also have never learned to filter my thoughts before I speak. Now that I’m solidly middle-aged, I’ve developed some memory loss too.

So I’ve learned to compensate for these weaknesses by talking fast. This enables me to not forget what’s in my head this instant, and two seconds later, when I’ve already moved on to something completely unrelated, I’m hoping others are distracted along with me.

In my opinion, big dangly earrings make women look younger and energetic. Most people are too busy looking at the gaudy earrings to notice my wrinkles ;-) Plus they make me look animated! Ok, this probably won’t work when I’m 80, but for now it’s a cheaper, safer alternative to a face-lift!

The point I’m trying to make is this: Although our flaws become concentrated with age, sometimes a little humor and a confident attitude go a long way in helping us and others adapt. I know I’ve quoted some famous theologians and philosophers in previous posts. This time, I’d like to end with a quote from a modern day philosopher, Tim Gunn, the mentor from the TV show Project Runway: "Make it work--use what you have on hand to transform your situation."
 

Hand-Holding

When my child was about 5 years old, we taught him to cross the street by himself. Even then, occasionally as we crossed a busy street together, he would reach out and hang on to our hands. We never slapped away his hand or ridiculed him for it. By the time he was 7, he was totally confident in his street-crossing abilities. He would run ahead of us, casually cross busy streets, and be waiting impatiently on the other side for us.

Many young people require a bit of hand-holding as they transition into new levels of maturity. Even after they are able to do things independently, they may reach out for guidance and comfort. It’s ok to grant them a grace period, allow them some time to get used to each new phase. As parents, we might feel as if we are coddling them, delaying their development into mature, confident grown-ups. Soon enough, they will be competent adults that are way ahead of us, waiting for us to catch up. And a few years later, they will be holding our hands again, this time helping us cross the street.

There is a difference between a young person reaching out for help and a parent who insists on a firm grip of control on an emerging adult. We, as parents, must encourage competence, not constrict it.

God, our Father, graciously holds on to our hands. HE would never turn away from us if we reach out to HIM for help, no matter what our age. At the same time, He would never stunt our growth by controlling us either.

“For I hold you by your right hand--I, the LORD your God. And I say to you, 'Don't be afraid. I am here to help you.” (Isaiah 41:13 NLT)

Lord, allow us to extend grace to our children, the same way YOU do for us. Show us how to guide them into maturity.

Mountains and Ravines

“You make springs pour water into ravines
So streams gush down from the mountains.
They provide water for all the animals…
You send rain on the mountains
From your heavenly home,
And you fill the earth with the fruit of your labor.” (Ps. 104:10,13 NLT)

Massive mountains and deep ravines… both are extremely difficult to navigate. Why did God create either? Why can’t life be more like gently rolling pasture land?
 
 Mountains cause air to rise and cool. The moisture in the air condenses and falls as rain on the windward side of the mountain. Ravines are cut into the mountains by the force of flowing water. So mountains promote rainfall, which falls into ravines, causing gushing rivers that sustain growth down-stream.

Every mountain in our life, every hardship, causes God’s spirit in us to rise, condense, and fall like rain. This rainfall leads to flowing water, which in turn carves deep channels within us, through which grace rushes down-stream, nourishing us and others.

There are phases in our life that are similar to gently rolling pasture land. Most of us prefer these periods of rest and peace over the hardships of climbing treacherous mountains. However, the extreme conditions, the radical changes in elevation and the physical and mental discipline that are required to summit these mountains, strengthen our faith and our trust in God. Our mountaintop experience promotes compassion, empathy, and vulnerability, which, in turn, enrich everyone that we encounter.

Restoration

Forgiveness, Healing, Restoration…

My husband and I like to watch TV shows about home renovations. Some old houses are totally gutted, and everything is replaced by modern materials and décor. Other historical houses are rebuilt to their former glory using antique pieces and salvaged material that fit the original style of the house. The plumbing and electrical wiring are updated, and a lot of work is put into reinforcing structural damage. I especially love it when the designers rip up carpeting and find hardwood flooring underneath! It’s fun to watch these transformations on TV, but I would not want to go through a home renovation in real life.
 
We all look forward to being restored to our former, whole condition. Sometimes, a layer of ourselves is removed to reveal God’s original perspective. Like hardwood, it might need some refinishing, but the end result is worth all the work. Other things, like innocence and idealism, can never be renovated to their original state. Instead, they have to be replaced by stronger support beams like maturity, clarity, and wisdom.

“I’m about to rebuild you with stones of turquoise,
Lay your foundations with sapphires,
construct your towers with rubies,
Your gates with jewels,
and all your walls with precious stones.
All your children will have God for their teacher—
what a mentor for your children!
You’ll be built solid, grounded in righteousness,
far from any trouble—nothing to fear!
far from terror—it won’t even come close!
If anyone attacks you,
don’t for a moment suppose that I sent them,
And if any should attack,
nothing will come of it.” (Isaiah. 54:7-11 MSG)