Perfectionism

“I'm not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ's servant.” (Galatians 1:10 NLT)

I have several bad habits; perfectionism is one of them. I tend to avoid things that I can’t do well. I’m trying to get over this. Over the last few years, I’ve intentionally set forth on several new ventures where I expose my weaknesses.

I started running long distances. As a slow, middle-aged woman with a weak bladder, this has not been easy for me.  I’ve had to get over several hang-ups. I was raised to always look presentable--but now I run without makeup and come back smelly and sweaty. I was afraid of driving in the dark, but now I drive out before sunrise to meet my early morning, running group. I definitely don’t like being the weakest member of any group, but I have had to accept that most runners are faster than me.

I used to be hesitant to speak up about my faith; I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it perfectly. Even after I started blogging about spiritual matters, I was afraid that my interpretations were incorrect, and that I may be misrepresenting Christ. I realize that my perfectionism stems from my distaste for disapproval. If I am committed to serve Christ, I can no longer be concerned about pleasing people. For God did not give me a spirit of timidity, but of power, love and sound judgment.

Purposeful Discomfort

“Fix your thoughts on what is true...” (Philippians 4:8 NLT)

When faced with uncomfortable situations, ask yourself: Is there a purpose to this discomfort? Wearing pants with a tight waistband when you are bloated has very little value. Getting a flu shot, on the other hand, may be worth the pain.  The path of suffering is not always to be avoided.

Standing up for what is good, true, and noble is rarely popular. There is bound to be some resistance. Although I often speak out against injustice, abuse, and inauthenticity, I have not yet learned to accept the discomfort that comes with it. Criticism makes me weak in the knees. I find myself drained, disoriented, and filled with self-doubt. I wonder if there is any point to what I’m doing. Wouldn’t it be easier to just go along and get along.

I may not be able to influence others, but each time I stand up for my beliefs, there is internal progress.  On the other hand, each time I allow myself to be bullied, manipulated, or shamed, I feel as if I have regressed. The older I get, the less time I have left. I can no longer afford to lose ground. Thus, I must focus on truth, not falsehoods--no matter how uncomfortable it gets.

Dear God

“Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you.”(Psalm 55:22 NLT)

According to a recent study by Michigan State University, expressive writing can help individuals process past traumas, as well as prepare us for stressful tasks in the future.

I find it very helpful to write things down. Well, I don’t actually ‘write’ much these days; I type. I journal my concerns, worries, questions, and insights. Much of this blog is my attempt at processing and understanding spiritual truths. However, not all my writing is public. I also have a prayer journal in which I write/type notes to God. I don’t censor my emotions. I don’t edit or try to choose the perfect words; instead, I type the thoughts as they come.  This practice has been deeply therapeutic.

Do you have some past trauma that you need to work through? Are you in the midst of a stressful situation right now? Perhaps concerns about the future are consuming you. Write or type a note to God. Tell Him whatever is on your mind. Hand over your burdens. He will take care of them.

Squandered Grace

“Companions as we are in this work with you, we beg you, please don't squander one bit of this marvelous life God has given us.” (2 Corinthians 6:1 MSG)

This year, most of the apples in our backyard went to waste. I forgot to spray them with oil before the buds appeared, so many of them were wormy. A few of the trees also got infected by a fungus called cedar-apple rust. Even after all of this, there were plenty of good apples left. Every so often, I would pick an apple and eat it as I went for my walk. In previous years, I would take the time to pick, sort, and distribute these fruits to friends and neighbors. I would also spend hours processing apples for my own family’s use--skinning, coring, and slicing the fruits--baking and preserving. But I got too busy with other stuff this year, so I ignored the apples.  Most of them just fell to the ground and rotted.

God has showered us with gifts of unmerited favor and access. Yet, most of us waste this precious grace. We yield to temptations of distraction, indulgence, and immorality. Our time and energy gets frittered away on personal ambitions and amusements. Meanwhile, the gifts that God has endowed us with are misused or ignored. They fall to the wayside, squandered.

Lord, help us not to take your grace for granted. Teach us to cherish your anointing, extract every precious drop, distill it down to its essence, and use it for Your purposes.

Hearing the Call

“‘Up on your feet and on your way to the big city of Nineveh! Preach to them. They're in a bad way and I can't ignore it any longer.’ But Jonah got up and went the other direction to Tarshish, running away from God.” (Jonah 1:2-3 MSG)

I grew up in the olden days, when kids used to played outside in the summer. Moms would call out from their porch when it was time to eat. Many of the kids would keep playing until they were either hungry enough to go home, or it got too dark to play outdoors.

As adults, many of us ignore God’s voice. We become absorbed in our own pursuits. The world provides endless distractions, amusements, and vices. So many things to procure, so much to achieve, so many people to please. Until it gets too dark to play. Suddenly we realize that we are starving for something more meaningful. Desperate, we run back to God. Even though we are not worthy, our infinitely compassionate God receives us with open arms and feeds us until we are satisfied.

Center of Gravity

"Among those who belong to Christ, everything connected with getting our own way and mindlessly responding to what everyone else calls necessities is killed off for good - crucified." (Galatians 5:24 MSG)

Under normal circumstances, standing upright is not difficult for an able-bodied person. But on an open beach, when wave after wave beats you down, it is hard to keep getting back up. Unless, of course, you are a surfer who has learned the art of riding the waves. Surfers are keenly aware of their center of gravity. They know to look forward in the direction they want to go, not down at the waves--and their body position naturally follows.

Many of us try to stand in the waves by digging our toes deeper into the sand. We double down, insisting on getting our own way, mindlessly responding to what everyone else calls necessities. We try to find stability by centering our lives on our impulses and desires. Those who belong to Christ should know better.

Faith is a lot like surfing. It takes a great deal of practice before we discover our true Center of Gravity. When Christ becomes our focal point, our pivotal concern, then we learn to ride the waves of adversity. Our confidence lies not in our own abilities, but in Christ’s strength working through us. We learn to look forward in alignment with God’s will, not down at the waves of our circumstances--and our thoughts and actions naturally follow.

Antidote to Discouragement

“Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God!” (Psalm 42:5 NLT)

Have you ever had a string of bad luck? The fridge breaks down one week; the washing machine goes out the next. The minivan gets in an accident; the rental car you got to replace it gets rear-ended. There is no time to recover as wave after wave of misfortune smacks you in the face. Discouragement seeps in. Why is all this happening right now?

Discouragement stems from feelings of inadequacy. When circumstances are beyond our control, it is natural to be overwhelmed. We turn to other people for encouragement, calling on our friends and family for support. Many of us try to fight off discouragement by trying to improve our level of competence. We put our hope in ourselves, in our persistence, strength, and resourcefulness.  

The antidote to discouragement cannot be found in our own abilities or the reassurances of others. These temporary stopgaps merely delay growth. There is only one good solution: Put your hope, your expectation, your confidence, in God. TRUST in HIM. Depend on Him completely. Check to see if you are clinging to anything else for security or significance. If so, let go. Surrender your desires, especially the desire for control. Detach from your long-held dreams, and allow the Spirit of God to take over. Ask. Listen. Follow.

“The godly face many dangers, but the Lord saves them from each one of them.” (Psalm 34:19 NET)

Divine Weapons

“The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.” (2 Corinthians 10:4 NIV)

When my son was younger, he used to spend a lot of time daydreaming instead of finishing his homework. Once when I asked him why he wasted so much time, he responded: “Mom, it might look like I’m not doing anything, but I’m actually accomplishing a lot that you can’t see.”

I was reminded of the above incident when I  read the following in Jesus Calling by Sarah Young:

“Spending time alone with Me can be a difficult discipline because it goes against the activity addiction of this age. You may appear to be doing nothing, but actually you are participating in battles going on within spiritual realms. You are waging war--not with the weapons of the world, but with heavenly weapons which have divine power to demolish strongholds.” (September 12th)

Time with God can seem unproductive, but it is where spiritual battles are fought. Solitude, silence, sacred listening, studying scripture, prayer, fasting, contemplation,worship, writing--all are divine weapons that are useful in demolishing strongholds of evil. Training in and using these weapons require much time and energy. The work you do in this arena is neither visible nor measurable; the world may not validate it as profitable. Yet, it is immeasurably worthwhile. The spiritual realm is the real battlefront. Everything else is merely theatrics.

“So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way.” (Ephesians 6:11 MSG)

The One Who Loves Me

“May the Lord lead your hearts into a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ.” (1 Thessalonians 3:5 NLT)

Who or what would you give yourself up for?

Think about the person who is most dear to you in this world. Would you give up your identity, control, power, independence, individuality, desires, ambitions, comfort, security, career, dignity, and all other relationships for this person?

Many of us imagine that we would die for our children, but while living we are reluctant to give ourselves up completely for their sake. It’s not that we don’t love our children; we just love ourselves, too. Would you give up on one of your children to save another one of your children? No!

God sacrificed His beloved Son to save me. Jesus gave up who He was--His identity, power, dignity--everything... for me. He suffered for me, died for me, left His Spirit for me. Like a good stay-at-home parent, the Holy Spirit gives of Herself completely--ungrudgingly, no strings attached, enduring patiently, never abandoning me. Why?

God  loves  me-- unconditionally, consistently, limitlessly.

Upper Levels

“My kingdom doesn’t consist of what you see around you.” (John 18:36 MSG)

Let’s say you lived in a high-rise building with many floors. The basement level has been taken over by crack addicts. Clearly, you don’t want to debase yourself by smoking what they are smoking. The next level is the main floor. Since it houses the lobby, things are much more presentable here. Filled with restaurants, bars, gift shops, and lounges--many who seek pleasure, comfort, and social acceptance hang out at this level.

Many of our prayers are centered around making our worldly life easier. We continue to be concerned about comfort, pleasure, and social acceptance. We remain on the lower levels and ask God to come down to feed our addictions. Jesus came into this world, to hang out at the lower levels with humanity. But his kingdom doesn’t consist of what we see around us. He calls us to join Him at the higher levels.

“There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am. And you know the way to where I am going.” (John 14:2-4 NLT)  

Sticky Windows

“We're being shown how to turn our backs on a godless, indulgent life, and how to take on a God-filled, God-honoring life. This new life is starting right now.” (Titus 2:12 MSG)

There are a few windows in our house that are ‘sticky’--once opened, they are difficult to close. We know which ones they are, so we tend not to open them. Sometimes, our house guests unknowingly open these windows. Other times, we forget which ones were problematic and unwittingly do this ourselves. Recently, one of our windows was opened too wide, and it came out of its track. When we tried to fix it, the latch broke off as well. We could close it partially, but there was an inch of space at the bottom where we were exposed to the external elements.  As long as the weather was favorable, it wouldn’t be a huge issue. The crack wasn’t big enough for a thief to break in, and there was a screen on the window, so bugs couldn’t come in either. However, once it got cold, that gap would become a major issue. My husband took his next day off to work on this sticky window. It took him some concentrated effort, but he finally managed to get that window sealed again. I put some duct tape on it to remind ourselves to keep that window shut in the future.

Like windows, certain habits can be opened and closed at will, while others are difficult to control. Addictions, obsessions, and dependencies vary from person to person. Some people can drink alcohol occasionally, while, for others, even one drink can expose them to harm. Any craving can become a sticky window--gambling, gluttony, lust, greed, materialism, distraction, pride, the desire to control others, approval seeking, bitterness, entitlement, anger...

We are called to restrain ourselves from unwholesome, indulgent practices, and pursue a God-honoring life. Once we recognize our personal weaknesses, we can ask God’s help to shut these cracks and keep them sealed. It can be helpful to place reminders around ourselves, so that we don’t unwittingly expose ourselves to similar breaches in the future. There is no room for wickedness in those who belong to God.

“Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.” (Matthew 6:13 ESV)

Connecting Doors

“By entering through faith into what God has always wanted to do for us—set us right with him, make us fit for him—we have it all together with God because of our Master Jesus. And that’s not all: We throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us.” (Romans 5:2 MSG)

When we were kids, my cousins and I went to Disney World one summer. We got hotel rooms with connecting doors. I remember how eager we were for the adults to unlock both sides so that we could have access to each other’s rooms. We would run back and forth, unrestricted.  

Sin kept us separate from the Father. Jesus opened the locks. The Holy Spirit is the opening that allows us unrestricted access to God. Humans are allowed to exercise free will--we can choose to keep the door from our side closed. When we trust God, we don’t feel the need for separateness. We eagerly open our side of the door and discover that He has already thrown open His side of the door!

Living Faith

“You received Christ Jesus, the Master; now live him. You're deeply rooted in him. You're well constructed upon him. You know your way around the faith. Now do what you've been taught. School's out; quit studying the subject and start living it! And let your living spill over into thanksgiving.” (Colossians 2:6-7 MSG)

Over the last several years, I’ve been studying all there is to know about running a marathon. I’ve read countless books, watched tons of videos, talked to veteran runners, and even done some shorter distance races. However, I’ve been putting off actually running a marathon for several reasons: training for it is a huge commitment, it’s a painful endeavor, and I’m not sure that I will succeed in finishing 26.2 miles. After a good run, I feel optimistic, but on hot, humid days, I’m ready to quit running altogether. On these days, I remind myself to go back to the two basics of running: left foot, right foot,...left, right, left, right.

I also like to study Scripture and think about spiritual matters. Yet, I find it difficult to live out my faith, to go the distance with Christ. On good days, I’m not too shabby, but when conditions are unfavorable, I lose hope. While there may be many practical ways to apply faith, I often go back to two basic elements: trust and gratitude. Whether things are going well or not, I keep reminding myself to trust God and thank Him for everything.

I trust You, Lord,

I thank you, Lord,

Left, Right…

Life Search

“Who are you looking for?” (John 18:5 NLT)

Jesus was at his usual place when the soldiers came to arrest him. He didn’t try to hide who he was. He didn’t camouflage himself in any way. Instead, he stepped forward and identified himself.

Have you been searching all your life? Do you know where to look? Would you be aware of it if it were near?

Some of us chase after money, prestige, power, and pleasure. Others pursue meaning, purpose, contentment, stability, security, understanding, acceptance, love, nurturing, comfort, healing, joy, and peace. Yet, we never seem to find enough of what we seek. We remain dissatisfied and restless.

If you still haven’t found what you’re looking for, then you may just not know who you are looking for.  

“I AM he.” Jesus said.  (John 18:5 NLT)

Recognizing the Spirit

“God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’” (Acts 17:27-28 NIV)

During the past week, I have had two different people ask me to help them find their pulse. I showed them how to place two fingers near the carotid artery on the side of their necks. Once they knew how, it was no longer a mystery.  

Just as blood flows through our body, so does the Spirit of God. Yet, many of us are unable to sense this. We don’t know where to look. It helps to have someone show us how to feel our way toward God and find Him. He is not far from any of us. In fact, He is right at our fingertips. For in Him, we move and live and have our being.

Encouraging Each Other

“Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.” (Ephesians 6:18 MSG)

In the last few months, I have started running with a group in town. As one of the slowest members, I struggle to keep up. At first, this was disconcerting; I came home after each run, physically exhausted and mentally deflated. The critical voices in my head kept reminding me of my limitations. However, the rest of the running group continually spurred me on. On long runs, when I grew too tired, someone would stay close until I caught my breath and felt like I could go on. When self-doubt and fear of failure threatened to engulf me, their encouragement boosted my spirit. They gave me pointers on how to get stronger and push through mental barriers that come with fatigue. They showed me that I could do more than I thought I could do. Sometimes they just distracted me with funny stories, so I didn’t focus on the difficulties I faced.

As followers of Christ, we are called to keep each other’s spirits up so no one falls behind or drops out. We can do this through attentive kindness, persistent prayer, and consistent encouragement.  

Stay close to those who are dispirited and help them recognize the Spirit within them. Keep alert to the promptings of the Spirit of God. Allow God to work through you and speak through you. Be bold--both in intercessory prayer and in sharing insights. Do not be ashamed or embarrassed to be God’s tool or His fool. Uplift those who feel dejected; encourage those who are faint of heart; cheer on those who strive to fulfill God’s purposes.

Moving On

“They do not belong to this world any more than I do.” (John 17:16 NLT)

A few years ago, a friend of mine built a custom home on the other side of town from where she was living. However, even after her new house was ready, she didn’t fully move out of her old house for months. The kids still needed to finish out the school year, and the old neighborhood was close to everything familiar. She had a storage POD in her driveway. She slowly moved non-essential items into it whenever she had extra time. She got rid of a lot of useless clutter. The old house didn’t sell for months, and it required regular upkeep and staging. She was depending on the profit from the sale of this house to finance the new one. This transitional form of living continued for much longer than she anticipated. She remained attached to the old neighborhood and hesitant to fully commit to the new place.

The worldly life feels comfortable; it provides us with a sense of belonging. Our identities become enmeshed in our accomplishments, relationships, and social perceptions. We sense there is something better, but we are reluctant to leave behind the things that feel familiar and cozy. Oftentimes, we look to religion to aid in the transition. Like portable storage units, church groups allow us to keep living mostly in the world while dipping our toes in the spiritual realm. This promotes an illusion of progress, but it is far from Truth.   

Our new home is set apart from the commonplace. It requires us to leave behind the familiar and fully commit ourselves to Divine Truth. Sanctification is not comfortable. The move can be socially isolating. However, once we manage to detach from worldliness, we are ushered into our new home. We are engulfed by holiness. We are unified in relationship with the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Magnify

“I glorified you on earth by completing down to the last detail what you assigned me to do.” (John 17:4 MSG)

Jesus glorified the Father by completing what He was assigned to do. He lifted up the Father, revealing Him so that humanity may better understand God. He sacrificed so that we may be brought into the unified relationship of the Triune God.

How can we glorify God?

We are meant to be like luminaires--elevating, magnifying, and diffusing the light that Christ has shared with us. Only by separating ourselves from the materialistic world can we consecrate our lives to Something Worthy; we  are called to reveal God’s character, to clarify  Truth, to know Him and make Him known.  

Lord Jesus, enable us to complete, down to the last detail, what we were assigned to do. Help us to magnify God so that all may share in the ecstasy of being united with the Father.

Overcomer

“Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33 NLT)

From birth to death, life presents itself with a series of obstacles. Learning to overcome these challenges is part of the human experience. Most of us try to train our minds and muscles, hoping to conquer these barriers on our own. We succeed to a certain extent. This reinforces our inherent sense of self-sufficiency and competence.

Until, one day, when we find ourselves completely depleted, overwhelmed, unable to overcome the feelings of hopelessness and despair. Then what? Do we give in to defeat? Or do we rely on a Higher Power?

Jesus has conquered the world. He has overcome the trials and tribulations of the human experience. We, too, are conquerors, because we have the Lord fighting for us. His Divine Power enables us to surmount the barriers that come before us.  We are overcomers through the strength of Christ.

“Conquerors will sit alongside me at the head table, just as I, having conquered, took the place of honor at the side of my Father. That's my gift to the conquerors!” (Revelation 3:21 MSG)

Productive Pain

“It will be like a woman suffering the pains of labor. When her child is born, her anguish gives way to joy because she has brought a new baby into the world.” (John 16:21 NLT) 

Pain is part of the process of bringing a child into this world. This is an example of productive pain which leads to gain. Sacrificial love, personal growth, and unfailing faith all come with suffering. Yet, this kind of pain is worth embracing, because the benefits outweigh the cost.

While in the midst of pain, it is difficult to tell if what we are going through is worth it. A woman going through labor often wonders why she has to go through this agony. Similarly, life can sometimes feel like a prolonged labor session--just a series of endless contractions with very little progress. It’s natural to question the purpose of suffering when we are discouraged and exhausted. We scream in frustration at the God who put us in this predicament. Yet, God stays by our side, holding our hand in a firm grip, as we push through to eternal joy.  

“Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.” (1 Corinthians 15:57-58 ESV)