Reason

According to Dallas Willard, reason is the mental power to trace out connections in reality. The reasonable person is the one who is devoted to truth, and to finding it and living in it by all available means. (http://www.dwillard.org/resources/WillardWords.asp)

For example, let’s say you have a friend or relative who starts making you uneasy. You can’t pinpoint what it is that makes you uncomfortable--just this nagging sense that something feels ‘off’ about the situation. If you like this person and have invested time and energy into this relationship--you will be reluctant to accept these intuitions.

Most of us have our minds made up about certain things. We develop tunnel vision. We ignore signs that our beliefs need updating. When we cannot or will not accept the correlation between certain behaviors or events, we are being unreasonable.

Reason is the ability to recognize signs of Truth. It allows us to make connections. It prevents us from ignoring symptoms of malignancy, false beliefs, and corruption. When a decision we have made turns out to be wrong, when a job for which we relocated ends up being unsuitable, when a friend we trusted betrays us--it is difficult to accept that our judgment was off. Reason enables us to operate under the influence of Truth, even when it is uncomfortable.

Word

“In the beginning the Word already existed.

The Word was with God,

and the Word was God.

He existed in the beginning with God.

God created everything through him,

and nothing was created except through him.

The Word gave life to everything that was created,

and his life brought light to everyone.

The light shines in the darkness,

and the darkness can never extinguish it.”

(John 1:1-5 NLT)

Although this passage is familiar to most Christians, it is still enigmatic. The use of the common ‘Word’ makes it generic and ambiguous. In order to delve into this passage, it might be better if we use the original Greek version of the word: Logos.

Logos (Greek): expression of a thought, analogy, divine communication, message, promise, reasoning expressed by words, wisdom.

Dabar (Hebrew): word, expression, commandment, order.

Words are orderly expressions of thoughts. They shed light and bring understanding. They enable communication and thus communion. Without words--there is just chaos, darkness, confusion, disconnection, and unawareness.  Substituting these concepts in the above verses helps us understand this passage a little better.

Marriage Maintenance

I’ve been observing and learning from couples who have been married for two or more decades. Some of these relationships are like lush tropical gardens--growing, flourishing--adding beauty and value to their surroundings. Others resemble long-term prison sentences--they seem miserable, and their discontent spills over to everyone around them.

A healthy marriage requires constant maintenance and abundant Grace. I haven’t found any universal formulas or tips that work for every marriage. But a few key behaviors seem to be present in many good marriages:

-Practice authenticity and honesty--no lying, no faking, no acting, no drama--not to yourself, your spouse, or the rest of the world.  

-Express Respect--mutual respect and self-respect are absolutely essential. Having respect for your spouse and yourself is only the first step. Showing respect (honor) consistently through your words, choices, and actions is just as crucial. 

-Stay engaged--communicate with words, actions, and body. Express your love and admiration frequently and spontaneously. However, when you do need to convey anger, frustration, disappointment, or disapproval--pick the time and place carefully, and do it calmly and fairly. Listen. Pay attention to your spouse--to the spoken and the unspoken.

-Agree on what is important--Reevaluate what is valuable at every new stage of life.

-Don’t get too comfortable or take each other for granted--When you have been married for a long time, it’s easy to fall into the rut of the companionship zone. It’s nice to have a spouse who is also your best friend, but not at the expense of passion. It’s better to cultivate platonic relationships outside of your marriage and stoke the romantic intensity in your marriage.

-Live together--This seems obvious, but many couples end up living separate lives under the same roof. They share expenses and responsibilities--but not each other.  

-Forgive--There will be so many opportunities for forgiving inadequacies and mistakes--both your spouse’s and your own.

-Rely on Divine Grace--Don’t attempt to keep a marriage maintained properly on your own. The anointing of Grace prevents the constant friction from wearing you down.

Ready for Light

I’m one of those people who crave light. I like to keep all the window shades open and turn on every light in the house. But there are times when I prefer low lighting. Recently, I went to a party and hadn’t colored my grey hair. I was thankful that the lights weren’t too bright--it made me feel less self-conscious.

“Light exposes the true character of everything because light makes everything easy to see. That's why it says: "Wake up, sleeper! Rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." (Ephesians 5:13-14 GWT)

Not everyone appreciates light. It exposes flaws and unmasks self-deception. Most of us are content with living on the surface. We don’t want to think or look at things too deeply. Many of us stay comatose; some of us sleep-walk through our entire lives. We become like zombies, merely following the motions of other zombies. Only those who are shaken awake from their unconscious existence welcome the light.

Light induces awakening. Thus, when you are ready to wake up, light is received gladly. You no longer want to stay in darkness. You gradually move from unconsciousness to consciousness. Something stirs within us; we leave the comfort of our familiar beds; we stretch; we become more alert, active, and aware. We open ourselves to the light.

“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned.” (Isaiah 9:2 NIV)

Backstage

When I was younger, I enjoyed being a part of our school theatrical productions. Kids would get dressed up in costumes and act out their roles; the audience of relatives would watch the performance attentively and applaud enthusiastically. Meanwhile, there would be a lot of things happening backstage to make the whole production function.

I like to think of the Spiritual Realm as what happens backstage during a play. We can sense what goes on in this visible world. What is happening backstage is imperceivable, yet, it is integral.

“We look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” (2 Cor. 4:18 NIV)

Unfortunately, many of us  focus  only on what is perceptible. We often fail to acknowledge the level of organization and coordination that is happening in the spiritual realm. The stuff of this world--the roles we play, the props we use, the costumes we wear, the lines we say--all are fleeting. Whereas all that is happening just behind the curtain is enduring.

Messy Candles

I bought some LED candles recently. They are battery powered, so they are safer and less messy than real candles. The LED candles are mostly for decoration though. I use wax candles every morning during prayer time. I have a small collection of candle holders of various shapes, sizes, and textures. I place the same kind of candle in each of them, but they each emit light in different ways. The real candles are messy--they melt unevenly and stick to the candle holder; their wicks need trimming; the smoke leaves black streaks on surfaces. If left unattended, they can be a fire hazard.

“You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world.” (Matthew 5:15 MSG)

I want to bring light to the world, but I don’t like all the messy melting and burning that is involved. Most days, I  would rather be like these modern, decorative, LED candles--no mess, no fuss, no fire.

Yet, God continually reminds me that I must be a real candle--burning with fire that requires attention, melting and sticking to my surroundings, bringing warmth as well as light, and releasing my aroma as I shrink to nothingness.  

Small Steps

Clarity is elusive. Certainty is rare. Although it is tempting to remain stagnant when we are unsure of our path, we must take small steps. Or else we can get mired in self-doubt, confusion, and aimlessness.

 

The kind of small steps we take, the direction in which we go, and our pace are all highly individual. Here are a few examples of the small steps that I take when I am unsure of how to proceed:

-Praying (This includes thanksgiving, trust, and meditating on Scripture)

-Taking care of self (basic hygiene, nutrition, rest, exercise, grooming)

-Caring for dependents (This includes anyone who relies on me--my child, my husband, my dog, my friends, even my plants)

-Working toward small, reachable goals.

Uncertainty saps confidence. Even small accomplishments can reverse this downward spiral. In my late 20’s, I had very little control over certain aspects of my life, but I still had control of my body. I was not athletic--when attempting to jog in my neighborhood, I couldn’t even run from one lamp post to the next without getting winded. So that became my goal. Once I was able to run the space of one lamp post, I aimed for higher and higher mileage goals. It took me 17 years to reach my goal of running a half-marathon. Running didn’t solve my issues, but accomplishing small goals strengthened me physically and mentally.

During times of uncertainty, our natural tendency is to focus on the chaos and disorder--on what is out of our control, on what can’t be changed, on our powerlessness. This leads to despondency and stagnation. If your life is in turmoil, don’t sink into despair. Take small steps out of the mess. When in darkness, even the tiniest spark of light can be tranformational.