The Illusion of Perfection

Do you ever look at a person and think:

Gosh, she’s so perfect; she has the perfect family; her kids are so talented; her husband is always doting on her; her house always looks immaculate; she’s always so put together; I bet she hasn’t had to suffer like the rest of us…And darn it, I HATE HER!

I used to do this when I was younger—see someone who looked like she had the perfect life from the outside, create a whole fantasy narrative—and then proceed to feeling yucky around her. Then I noticed that I only did this to other gals, not guys. Why?

Well, because I didn’t compare myself to the guys. I might observe a guy who seemed like he had a good life, and my reaction never went beyond a neutral shrug. Yet, when I saw a woman that gave off the illusion of perfection, I felt immediate pangs of inadequacy and dissatisfaction.

As I got older, I realized that my perception of reality was skewed. Nobody has a perfect life. Every person suffers and struggles at some point or another. Sometimes sadness can be covered up; other times it can’t. If you have a huge scar on your back, you can camouflage it behind clothes. However, if you have even a small pimple on your face, it is very difficult to hide it from others. Some people are just more comfortable about sharing their pain than others are. I usually don’t show my private scars to people when I first meet them, but most of my close friends have seen every blemish. 

So, next time you think someone has a perfect life, remember…the perception of perfection is merely an illusion.