Put Yourself On The List

It’s not often that I hear something on TV that is thought-provoking, but I did the other day. Tyler Perry was talking about how women tend to focus on taking care of others and often neglect their own health. He mentioned that more women need to put themselves on their priority list. He didn’t say they need to be on the top of the list...just somewhere on there.

The concept of putting your health somewhere on your priority list seems reasonable to me. Most of us are awake for 16 hours or more per day. We should be able to spend 10% of our waking hours (about 90 min) taking care of our health.

When I was a new mom, I always felt guilty about taking time to do anything for myself. There was so much to do, so many things that needed my attention. By the time I got halfway through my to-do list, I would run out of energy. Even basic self-care, like taking a long shower or going to the potty when I needed to go, seemed like too much of a luxury. I ate whatever was left over on my kid’s plate, decided that carrying laundry up and down the stairs was all the exercise I needed, and rarely attended to my mental health. I was determined not to neglect my child, my husband, or any other responsibilities, but in the process I neglected myself. I failed to realize that I was responsible for taking care of my own physical, mental, and spiritual health. I was a grown woman, and no one else could take care of me…other than me. This is not to say that I spent every minute of every day taking care of someone else. I didn’t. I spent a lot of my waking hours exhausted, succumbing to mindless diversions.

I wish I had heard this message back then…that it was okay to put your health on your top 10 list every day. Well, now I know better, so I shall do better. I won’t feel guilty about taking time to exercise, preparing a healthy meal—even if it is something which only I might eat—taking mental health breaks, and reserving time and space for prayer. Getting adequate sleep is still elusive for me, yet I know that this is also a healthy habit I need to cultivate somehow.

I have observed that most women, when they do spend time or money on themselves, tend to focus on cosmetic things like hair, nails, clothes, accessories, etc. Maybe this is because taking care of your health involves more daily time, energy, and discipline. 

What would your daily schedule look like if you committed 10% of your waking hours to taking care of your physical, mental, and spiritual health? How would your life change if you put yourself, your health, somewhere on your priority list?  

Running The Gauntlet

I’m afraid. I’m actually sick with worry. My suppressed anxiety is manifesting itself in a multitude of physical ailments: hypertension, cold sores, headaches, exhaustion, sciatica, neck pain, chest pain, insomnia. I feel this sense of impending doom as I prepare to run the gauntlet once again. (Historically, ‘running the gauntlet’ was a form of punishment where a person would be forced to run between parallel lines of men who would strike him. These days, the idiom is often used to describe the experience of enduring a series of personal attacks or criticisms.)

“The battle is not yours, but God’s.” (2 Chronicles. 20:15 NLT)

“Don’t be afraid; don’t pay any mind to this vandal horde. This is God’s war, not yours…You won’t have to lift a hand in this battle; just stand firm, and watch God’s saving work for you take shape. Don’t be afraid, don’t waver. March out boldly tomorrow—God is with you.” (2 Chronicles. 20:15-17 MSG excerpts) 

This is God’s battle. He is in charge. I do have a small, but crucial role to play. I have to be firm, courageous, bold, trusting, and confident in God’s ability to defeat the opposition. I may have to run the gauntlet, but I am running it with Christ. I can get through all situations with Christ who strengthens me.

Flawed Recipes

When I first started cooking, someone gave me a meatloaf recipe. It wasn’t particularly tasty, nor was it healthy. Yet, it was fairly simple to make, and it required very few ingredients. So I kept repeating it—it was one of my quick, no-brainer recipes that I kept on hand when I didn’t have time to go grocery shopping or the energy to think or plan ahead. After a few years, I realized that there were much healthier alternatives.

Similarly, many of us operate under flawed paradigms. These unhealthy assumptions have become so habitual that we rarely question them. We repeatedly go back to familiar thought patterns, even though we know there are much better alternatives.

Here are a few commonly-held, flawed assumptions:

--Nice girls don’t say no.

--If someone is discontent, then it is probably your fault.

--Taking care of yourself is equivalent to being selfish.

--Personal boundaries are unfriendly.

--If you don’t try new things, you won’t fail; if you don’t fail, you won’t look stupid.

--If I manage my relationships properly by contributing, maintaining, nurturing—even if I have to do all the 'relating' myself--then I can protect these relationships from disintegrating. Thus, I can control my relationships and not be abandoned or neglected.

--It is your responsibility to rescue those in trouble.

Whether it is these or some other bad assumptions that are replaying in our subconscious minds, they influence our reactions, choices, and behaviors. Like a computer with malware imbedded in it, our operating system is now controlled by this malicious code of thinking. If these bad assumptions are not removed, we become ineffective—living under the rule of our oppressors, captives in the kingdom of flawed paradigms.   

Breathing Room

(From Psalms Study)

“You’ve always given me breathing room, a place to get away from it all.” (Ps. 61:3-5 MSG)

“He’s solid rock under my feet, breathing room for my soul.” (Ps. 62:1-2 MSG)

Two different psalms in a row allude to God giving us breathing room. Many of us think of our faith life—our relationship with God—as inhibiting and confining. We rarely associate phrases like--‘letting loose,’ ‘letting your hair down,’ or ‘living with abandon,’--with the Christian faith.

This reminds me of this new fad called ‘the corset diet.’ Women wear tight corsets all day—while they eat, work, drive, and even sleep. They claim it helps them lose weight—mainly because eating becomes very uncomfortable. However, wearing a corset all day can also restrict breathing and damage your internal organs.

This is how most of us think of our relationship with Christ—like a corset diet—restrictive, constricting, limiting—where we have to follow a bunch of rules and regulations—like we are walking around in a girdle or Spanx all day. I’m not saying that a relationship with God doesn’t require discipline and dedication—it does. But, it is also expansive and freeing in its own way. 

“I can’t tell you how much I long for you to enter this wide-open, spacious life. We didn’t fence you in. The smallness you feel comes from within you. Your lives aren’t small, but you’re living them in a small way. I’m speaking as plainly as I can and with great affection. Open up your lives. Live openly and expansively!” (2 Cor. 11-12 MSG)

Prisoners

How do you convince someone to stay out of prison? Prisoners who have been incarcerated for long periods become acclimatized to the prison lifestyle. All their acquaintances are also imprisoned, so they start thinking: this is just how everyone lives.

I read the following on The Minimalists, a blog written by Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus:

“There’s a shopping mall in San Diego that used to be a prison. Restored, repurposed, and redecorated, it’s hard to imagine that this place once imprisoned hundreds of inmates.

One might argue, however, that it’s a different kind of prison now. A voluntary incarceration, caged by the invisible walls of consumption.

This might sound hyperbolic, but it’s an apt analogy. After all, consumption isn’t the problem; compulsory consumption (consumerism) is the problem. We’ve trapped ourselves by thinking that consumerism will make us happy, that buying shit we don’t need will somehow make us whole.

We’ve gotten good at fooling ourselves, too. We’ve over decorated the jailhouse walls—walls we’ve built around ourselves—and we’ve made our cells so comfortable that we’re terrified to leave. But a prison cell with a view is still a prison cell.” (The Minimalists Blog http://www.theminimalists.com/prison/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+theminimalists%2FHztx+%28The+Minimalists%29 )

I felt convicted by the above writing. We are a high consumption society, and most of us are prisoners of debt. We work to pay off debt, and we consume to distract ourselves from the burden of debt. Consumption and debt are the motors that drive our economy and our lifestyle. Everyone we know is also in the same boat. We don’t even know how we would live outside these prison walls.

Yet, there are many people on the outside living in freedom. Their simple lifestyles rarely attract notoriety. They contribute more than they consume. They are not confined by materialism. They do not owe, thus, no one owns them. They are not slaves, but masters of their own lives. 

Beyond Restoration

I recently heard a sermon about the resurrection of Lazarus (John Chapter 11). Here is a synopsis: Lazarus was a friend of Jesus. Jesus heard that Lazarus was dying. He waited until Lazarus was dead and then went to visit his family. Then Jesus went to the tomb and restored Lazarus back to life. However, Lazarus was still bound and wrapped like a mummy. Jesus left the task of unbinding Lazarus to others.

The sermon ended on an unsatisfactory note for me. Why did Jesus wait so long and allow his friend to die? And what practical message am I supposed to get from all this?  

I have encountered several situations that seemed beyond hope—marriages that were so broken, addictions that were too far gone, illnesses that were past healing, messes that were beyond restoration. I’ve often wondered why God allows things to get so far beyond redemption!

Maybe if he intervened any earlier, we would imagine we got ourselves out by our own power?

Even though God restores life, he leaves the ‘unbinding’ for others to do. There is not much point in resurrecting someone if he/she remains in bondage! When God restores a broken marriage, or heals addictions or sickness, or cleans up horrible messes caused by character flaws—how are we supposed to unbind these individuals? They may not be able to disentangle from their constraining habits without assistance.

Reach out with compassion, extend grace, forgive, bestow unmerited trust. Grant them light, breathing room, and acceptance. 

Being a Mentor

 “Tell older women to live their lives in a way that shows they are dedicated to God. Tell them not to be gossips or addicted to alcohol, but to be examples of virtue. In this way they will teach young women to show love to their husbands and children, to use good judgment, and to be morally pure. Also, tell them to teach young women to be homemakers, to be kind, and to place themselves under their husbands' authority.” (Titus 2:3-4 GWT)

I see myself as an ‘older woman’ now. I have been married for 23 years, and I am a mother of an adult son. Whether I want to be a role model or not, others are influenced by my choices. If I indulge in any habit-forming behavior—whether it is using alcohol or any other mind-altering drugs, overspending, overeating, wasting time online, or being idle—it may cause others to stumble. And I cringe as I write this last part…If I neglect my home, my husband, or even my adult son, while I pursue my own agenda— If my attempts at personal development diminish my husband’s role as leader and provider…I set a bad example.

I once took a ceramics class from a teacher who made beautiful pottery. My pots, on the other hand, were always embarrassingly lopsided and lumpy. Yet my teacher never offered to get her hands on my project. She gave hints on how I could improve my technique. She kept teaching by example, showing me and the rest of the class how to mold symmetrical works of art.

In our desire to help young moms, sometimes we can be tempted to temporarily take over some of their duties. Even though our intentions are to empower them to be better wives and mothers, we end up enabling them to be neglectful instead.  

There are several ways that older women can be good mentors. We can listen, comfort, encourage, give of our time, and share our experiences. And if we have expertise in any one area—whether it is baking, sewing, cooking, homeschooling, child care, laundry, decorating, cleaning, dealing with finances, taxes, technology, difficult relationships, addictions, children with disabilities, rebellious teens, family health issues—we can teach younger women on how to be more proficient at these skills.

Most of all, we can encourage others by sharing how God has worked in our lives--how He is dependable, how we have come thus far by His grace alone. 

Investment vs. Giving

I used to invest in people. I put time and effort into nurturing relationships in the hopes that someday there would be a positive return of some sort--maybe this friendship would be educational, entertaining, enlightening, enjoyable, or mutually beneficial. 

Now that I am older, I find that I prefer to give of myself rather than investing. I’m no longer looking for relationships that give back. I’m at a stage of life where I feel blessedly content—most of the time. God has poured his mercy and abundant grace into my life; thus, I’m less worried about running out of resources as I share.

However, I don’t give of myself indiscriminately. I recently met a person who would benefit from a good friend. Yet, I’m pretty sure that, in this case, I am not fit to fulfill this role in her life. She is more likely to pollute me than I am likely to influence her. Instead of bringing out the best in each other, we are more likely to bring out the worst in each other. Spending any energy on this friendship would take away resources from other relationships where I could actually make a difference.

Luckily, most of my friendships are fertile and cultivable. I’m happy to plant seeds in their lives, even though I might not be involved in the harvest—for I have been on the receiving end of such grace. Many others have given freely to me without any expectations of reciprocation. They believed in me when I couldn’t believe in myself. They dug up treasures that were so deeply buried within me that I didn’t know of their existence. Now it is my turn to do the same for others.

“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Discernment vs. Judgment

Most humans are endowed with varying degrees of the five traditional senses: sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste. In addition to these, some people are endowed with innate capacities for music, balance, symmetry, recognizing patterns, kinesthetic senses, rhythm, and intuition. These inborn senses can be developed further through continual application and practice.

Good judgment is one of these senses. The ability to size up a person or situation and to react prudently can be a valuable skill. Life is a lot like a play in which actors wear masks as they act out their roles. Some people are more adept at recognizing the true characters behind the masks.    

I used to think that judgment and discernment were synonymous. I no longer use these words interchangeably. I have observed young people with a good sense of judgment, but they lack discernment. Yet, discernment is not merely a product of age and experience either. For I have met older people with neither good judgment nor discernment.

I have come to believe that while good judgment is a human trait, discernment is a divine gift. Whereas good judgment allows you to see behind the masks, discernment enables you to know what’s going on backstage. You see beyond what is being presented on the world’s stage to the spiritual influences behind the drama.

Some people are good at watching a movie and predicting what’s going to happen and which characters are pretending to be good guys, but will actually turn out to be bad guys. This is similar to having good judgment. Discernment is more like watching a DVD movie with a director’s commentary—you don’t need to guess or use your intuition—you can hear the director’s voice telling you exactly what his intentions are as the scene is unfolding.

I have experienced brief moments of discernment—backstage passes that last mere minutes. Most of the time, I depend on my judgment rather than seek discernment. This is partially due to pride and the need to think independently. I tend to rely on my own previous experiences rather than listen to the Director’s voice.

“Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.” (1 Cor. 13:12 NLT)

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Self Rescue

I am passionate about certain subjects: faith, family, authenticity, natural health, living within one’s means, nurturing friendships, and giving a hand up to those in need. I spend a lot of time thinking about these topics, because I want to avoid common pitfalls—I might not be able to save myself once I get into trouble, but I can try to prevent getting into trouble. A person who is drowning may not be able to save himself, but he can make choices which may keep him safe. He can either train to be a strong swimmer or avoid deep water. Yet, even the most careful person will occasionally fall into deep trouble.

“There’s no such thing as self-rescue…The cost of rescue is beyond our means.”(Ps. 49:7-9 MSG)

The key is to realize when we are in too deep, when we have sunk too low, when we have reached beyond the point of self-extrication. It’s imperative that we call for help at this point. 

“Save me, O God, for the floodwaters are up to my neck. Deeper and deeper I sink into the mire; I can’t find a foothold. I am in deep water, and the floods overwhelm me. I am exhausted from crying for help; my throat is parched. My eyes are swollen with weeping, waiting for my God to help me….Don’t let the floods overwhelm me, or the deep waters swallow me, or the pit of death devour me. Answer my prayers, O Lord, for your unfailing love is wonderful. Take care of me, for your mercy is so plentiful. Don’t hide from your servant; answer me quickly, for I am in deep trouble!” (Ps.69:1-3, 15-17 NLT)

Beyond Our Means

Author Matthew Amster-Burton has an interesting perspective about living within your means:

“Your lifestyle can easily creep beyond your means to pay for it. Even if you’re not spending more money than you have, it’s all too easy to spend money today that should be set aside for retirement.” (https://www.mint.com/blog/how-to/living-beyond-your-means/)

Most professionals get paid once a month and usually develop the discipline to save some money for their end-of-the-month expenses. A person who fails to budget for the last week of the month would be considered irresponsible. We all know that we are likely to live past our earning years, yet we fail to plan for the last few decades of our life. We not only spend money that should be set aside for tomorrow, we get into debt to subsidize today’s lifestyle choices. Yesterday’s luxury becomes today’s entitlement and tomorrow’s necessity. As our needs go up, so does our cost of living. Consumption and contentment seem inversely proportional.

We live as if our bodies and minds will always stay at maximum efficiency, even though we see how aging changes those around us. When we neglect our bodies, minds, and souls—this too is living beyond our means. We live in denial, failing to plan for the final stages. 

Living within your means involves understanding the full expanse of your life. A maxed-out lifestyle depletes our reserves early, while a minimalist lifestyle is more likely to cultivate contentment. 

Fearless

Although I present a tough exterior, I’m quite chickenhearted. I’m fearful about many things: being outside after dark, tornadoes, the safety of my loved ones, illness, economic collapse, addictions, and evil in all its various manifestations. I put up a brave front—speaking words of courage, while hoping no one notices my shaky knees.

For the last few months, I have been trying to do something uncomfortable once a week. I’ve intentionally extended myself beyond my comfort zone in order to stretch. For example, I did some public speaking, I drove a few times in the dark, I changed several little bad habits, I modified certain self-limiting behaviors, I shared some personal tragedies so that others can benefit from my experiences, and I extended grace in situations that I normally would have avoided. These deliberate, methodical practices have made me more flexible.

However, not every situation that is uncomfortable promotes growth. For example, a silent alarm goes off inside me when I am around certain unstable people or dangerous circumstances. I can sense that I need to stop. I follow my instincts and move in a different direction. Sometimes hyperextension can cause dislocation. Bending over backwards is much more risky than bending forward.

Eleanor Roosevelt said: “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'”

I agree with Eleanor Roosevelt…partially. I have gained strength when I push beyond my fears. Yet, I have also learned to listen to my instincts. But most of all, my previous experiences have taught me this valuable lesson: My confidence is not in my own wisdom or ability. It is God who has gotten me through many horrors. With HIS help I can take the next thing that comes along.   

“God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. So we will not fear when earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea.” (Ps. 46:2 NLT)

One Poor Decision

According to a report by the Corporation for Enterprise Development, nearly half of Americans are one paycheck away from financial disaster. Many of us don’t have enough liquid assets to subsist for a few months in case of an emergency. http://scorecard.assetsandopportunity.org/2013/measure/liquid-asset-poverty-rate.

Even those of us who might have adequate financial savings are still vulnerable to poor choices. Living beyond one’s means, not being able to distinguish wants from needs, getting into debt, and making bad investments are all common practices. However, following the herd, in this case, can lead us to fall off the cliff.

Poor choices can lead to hazards in other areas of life as well. One bad decision to be unfaithful can crumble a marriage. One bad decision to drive home after a few drinks can ruin your life and that of others. One bad decision to have unprotected sex can have major consequences. One bad decision to ignore a health problem may result in serious complications. One bad decision to engage in potentially addicting habits like gambling, pornography, or drug use may turn into terminal bondage. One bad decision in choosing your spouse, your friends, or your business partner can change the trajectory of your life.

It takes a series of good choices to construct a good life, yet one poor choice can demolish years of careful building. One sneaky person can easily push you into an abyss, but it takes several caring individuals and much effort to pull you out. None of us are immune from making mistakes, but we can be more intentional—especially about decisions that have a long-term impact. Once we realize that we are all one bad decision away from a crisis, hopefully we shall be more alert and deliberate in our choices.   

Broken Compass

In his book, Predictably Irrational, Dan Ariely discusses how humans tend to revert to the reptilian part of our brains when we are really angry, hungry, frightened, or aroused. Even those of us who have good moral compasses can break down and operate from our baser animal instincts when under extreme duress. Understanding this human predilection can be crucial. During intensely stressful situations, we can hold back from making decisions that may determine the trajectory of our lives.

Airplanes and helicopters are equipped with built-in compasses. However, since compass readings can be distorted by other magnetic fields, the wiring of instrument panels, etc., pilots usually have an external compass which they use as a backup.

Our internal compasses can be distorted by the way we are wired. We cannot rely solely on our conscience, judgment, self-discipline, or willpower. We have to look toward a Higher External Compass.

“Give me your lantern and compass, give me a map, so I can find my way to the sacred mountain, to the place of your presence…” (Ps. 43:3-4 MSG)

Validation and Approval

“Commit your future to the Lord! Trust in him, and he will act on your behalf. He will vindicate you in broad daylight, and publicly defend your just cause. Wait patiently for the Lord! Wait confidently for him! (Ps. 37:5-7 NET)

Overall, I’m a pretty confident person. Nobody would accuse me of being a ‘people-pleaser’. In fact, I often come across as abrasive rather than appeasing. I’m usually not one to seek validation and approval, yet I am affected by disapproval and rejection. I make a lot of choices based on this distaste for disapproval, especially when I am around those I care about. I say ‘yes’ to things when I shouldn’t. I keep my mouth shut when I should speak up. I expend resources on ill-fitting projects. I embark on paths that are not meant for me. I do these things to avoid disapproval; yet, I find that these choices lead to discontentment—for me and for others. I feel uneasy, because I’ve made a choice to be inauthentic—to go along with something that doesn’t feel right. Others feel displeasure, because I’m probably not meeting their expectations; plus, they can tell that my heart is not in it.

“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (Galatians 1:10 NIV)

It is an Either/Or situation—we can either commit to being validated by God or continue to seek human approval. We can either trust God to vindicate our actions or attempt to futilely defend our choices to the world.

“Open up before God, keep nothing back; he’ll do whatever needs to be done;

He’ll validate your life in the clear light of day and stamp you with approval at high noon.” (Ps. 37: 5-7 MSG)

Inner Higher Calling

(Continuation of previous post)

In order to cancel out false messages which prevent us from hearing our true calling, we have to expose ourselves to inverted sounds that neutralize the lies.

We tend to surround ourselves with people who make us feel good about our choices. If we desire to stay stagnant, we find friends who are also apathetic, allowing us to conform to the status quo. If we long to indulge our baser instincts, we find peers who will pull us down further into the muck with them. Sometimes, we even follow others up the wrong hill. We mistakenly climb up this mound or that, imagining that we shall find ultimate happiness at the top. Many of us have clambered up the well-worn trails of Status Hill, Wealth Ridge, Ambition Cliff, Power Bluff, and Fame Slope—only to find that hiking up these foothills did not bring us satisfaction. Yet, each experience helps us grow stronger and wiser.

“Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing.” (Yeats)

The process of growth is what brings us satisfaction, not the accomplishment of any goal. Yet, if we want to grow, we search out mentors who are ahead of us on the Right Path, who encourage us to keep climbing higher—to be better versions of our current self. As we leave the valley where the herds graze mindlessly—as we climb up the Mountain of Truth—the cacophony of false messages gets fainter. We are able to hear our higher calling. As we climb, we grow stronger and more determined. 

Active Noise Control

God knows the path that He has planned for me. He has a specific itinerary for each of us. His Spirit speaks to my soul. Why can’t I understand this calling from the deep high places within me? There have been times in the past when I have understood my purpose. However, these days I cannot hear clearly. There is a static in my soul that interferes with the Spirit’s communication. I know what is causing this noise, this disturbance—it’s all the other communication channels that are open to me. If I could disconnect from everything else for even a little while, I might be able to understand better.

What I need is some noise-canceling headphones that fit my soul.

Noise-canceling headphones use a combination of soundproofing and active noise control to cancel out background noise and improve listening.

“A noise-cancellation speaker emits a sound wave with the same amplitude but with inverted phase (also known as antiphase) to the original sound. The waves combine to form a new wave, in a process called interference, and effectively cancel each other out - an effect which is called phase cancellation.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Active_noise_control

 Thus far, I’ve used different methods of soundproofing—physically putting space between me and the noise. However, I could also immerse myself in antiphase waves of sound that cancel out the undesirable messages that muddy my soul. Whether they are messages that endorse materialism, pride, hatred, greed, dominance, self-centeredness, insecurity, fear, worry, anxiety, doubt, despair, apathy, panic, desire, envy, anger…I would have to expose myself to just as many sources of opposing ideas of similar amplitude…

Continued...

Counterfeit Faith

Every religion imagines that it has a monopoly on Truth. Even within the same faith, each sect, each denomination--members will claim to be more enlightened than others. I am not going to suggest that I have discovered the ‘one true religion’ which has figured it all out. Yet, I have observed a disturbing trend: a wide-spread acceptance of counterfeit, watered-down, agenda-driven faith.

Whether a purse is made of real leather or man-made materials that look like leather, it still functions the same. However, using adulterated materials for the foundation of your house might have much bigger consequences. At first, the house might seem stable; but over time, cracks will appear and eventually there will be structural damage. Faith is less like an accessory and more like a home—thus counterfeit faith can be catastrophic.

Here are some signs of a counterfeit faith:

--looks good from the outside, but the insides are corrupted by immorality and lack of discipline.

--religious beliefs based on self-indulgence, self-interest, and self-promotion; “How can I convince God to make my life better?”

--more concerned about getting than giving.

--lacks durability, will degenerate over time.

“For you are so careful to clean the outside of the cup and the dish, but inside you are filthy—full of greed and self-indulgence!” (Matt. 23:25 NLT)

“The whole point of what we’re urging is simply love—love uncontaminated by self-interest and counterfeit faith, a life open to God.” (1 Timothy 1:5 MSG) 

“Real religion, the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is this: Reach out to the homeless and loveless in their plight, and guard against corruption from the godless world.” (James 1:27 MSG)

Rescued from a Concentration Camp

Once upon a time, I lived in a (metaphorical) concentration camp with masses of other prisoners. We were all kept in bondage by the Enemy. We were fed lies. We lived in fear, depravity, and degradation. ‘Evilitis’—a contagious infection of evil was rampant—causing a degeneration of the soul. We turned on each other, focusing on self survival above all else.

Then, one day, I was rescued.

Now I have the opportunity to live in a place of light and freedom. Yet, I keep missing my loved ones who are still in these camps. I am tempted to go back and rescue them—but this is beyond my power. I have to rely on the same Savior who rescued me to get them out too.

"[For it is He] Who delivered and saved us and called us with a calling in itself holy and leading to holiness [to a life of consecration, a vocation of holiness]; [He did it] not because of anything of merit that we have done, but because of and to further His own purpose and grace (unmerited favor) which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began [eternal ages ago]." (2 Tim 1:9 Amplified Bible)

We were rescued and given a higher calling to a consecrated life—not based on our merit or talents—but to further God’s purpose. Our emancipation came as an unmerited favor, yet it cost a great deal to our Savior. I, for one, shall not take my freedom for granted. 

“Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted.” (Ephesians 4:30 MSG)

Accumulating Piles

When I sweep my floors, I accumulate all the dirt in each section into little piles. Then I come back with my dustpan and sweep it all up. If someone walks by, I will warn them to ‘watch out for the piles.’ I don’t want them to step in my collection of dirt and spread it around again. Once I get all the dirt into my dustpan, I look at it for a moment and find some satisfaction in how much I’ve cleaned off my floors. If my husband is around, I’ll even show him the dustpan, saying: “Look at all this dirt that was on the floor!” Then, I dump all of it in the trash. The next day, I do it all over again.

“We make our pile, and then we leave it.” (Ps. 39:6 MSG)

All my accomplishments are like little piles of dust that I heap up when I’m sweeping. Even though I feel a momentary sense of satisfaction at what I have accumulated, in reality, it all amounts to nothing. Others might appreciate my efforts, might even be impressed by my piles of dirt—yet, everything I achieve is transitory.

Lord, help me to distinguish between that which is transiently satisfying and eternally meaningful.  

Solitude and Silence

During Spring Break, most people head to the beaches—where crowds of young people gather to relax and enjoy themselves. My soul craves to head up into the mountains—to solitude and silence—where the voice of God speaks through the majestic peaks, whispers through the wildflowers, and brings clarity through the crystalline lakes.

Theologian and author, Henri Nouwen describes solitude and silence from the viewpoint of early Christian monks who withdrew from worldly affairs and spent their lives in contemplation and manual labor in the deserts:

“The Desert Fathers did not think of solitude as being alone, but as being alone with God. They did not think of silence as not speaking, but as listening to God. Solitude and silence are the context with which prayer is practiced.” (The Way of the Heart by Henri Nouwen)

When we arrange little pockets of solitude and silence in our day to commune with God, He meets us in these quiet spots. These little retreats into solitude and silence, these mini-sabbaticals, become like rest stops on our daily journey. Alone with Him, we are able make Him our primary focus. Away from all the external and internal noise and chatter, we can finally listen to Him. He refreshes, recharges, and restores His Spirit within us.