Clean Living

My son’s preschool teacher, Miss G, had more energy than most people half her age. Her skin glowed, her eyes twinkled, and joy flowed out of her and onto everyone that came in contact with her. I remember asking her:

“Miss G, what is your secret? How do you always stay so chipper?”

She would answer with her usual beaming smile: “Always doing the right thing…clean living wins again.”

Needless to say, I suspected that she was withholding some secret “herbal” stash from me.

Now that I am older, I realize that Miss G was onto something. Clean living--or a non-toxic lifestyle—might be the fountain of beauty, energy, and happiness.

Most of us know what is right and good and non-toxic. In most instances we have a choice whether we immerse ourselves in a clean environment, but sometimes we don’t. We can choose healthful habits, positive friends, inspiring books, and pure spaces. However, some of us are trapped in polluted cities, forced to spend our day with profane coworkers, and then go home to malignant relatives.

When I worked in a clinical lab, we were required to wear protective gear while working with toxic substances. I wonder if there are similar ways to safeguard ourselves in emotionally toxic situations.

Over the years, I’ve discovered a few protective practices that help me: Prayer, removing myself from the situation as often as I can, going for a walk outside, talking to a friend, writing, getting enough sleep, eating healthily, staying aware…

I’ve also realized how very few things we do have control over. I no longer take these for granted. Not every choice I make is healthy, but whenever I do something that is good for me, it fills the space that something harmful could have filled. When I eat an apple, it might prevent me from eating one more candy bar. If I go for a run, it might replace 30 minutes of surfing the internet. If I call a friend, it might supplant stewing over my own fears and anxieties.  

If I have the option of making a good choice, to surround myself with affirming, supportive people, and to be in a peaceful environment, then I won’t let that opportunity pass me by. I seize every chance to commune with nature, converse with good friends, and immerse in prayer.

Mind Damage

The brain is a physical entity—a bundle of grey and white matter that controls the nervous system. We know what a brain looks like. Physicians can scan it and tell us when we have brain damage. The mind is different from the brain. It is not tangible. The mind is defined as the totality of conscious and unconscious mental processes and activities. Many of us deliberately cultivate toxic habits which harm our brains and minds.  

Some try to intentionally numb themselves with alcohol or recreational drugs—hoping to ‘black-out’ from reality for just a little while. Research shows that this common, socially acceptable habit can have negative long-term consequences. According to the National Institute of Health, alcohol can cause “brain-shrinkage” over time. “People who drink alcohol -- even the moderate amounts that help prevent heart disease--have a smaller brain volume than those who do not, according to a study in the Archives of Neurology.” (www.cnn.com)

Just as alcohol and drugs can cause physical brain damage, there are certain other toxic habits that may cause our minds to shrink.

Thinking often brings pain and discomfort. Most of us want to avoid pain, so we immerse ourselves in busy-ness or distractions. Most of us intentionally try not to think too deeply about things. We disconnect from conscious awareness as often as we can to avoid the discomfort that accompanies mindfulness. These frequent ‘block-outs’ can lead to mind damage. Remaining unconscious might be less painful in the short run, but it also impairs our ability to think rationally, thus making us more and more susceptible to delusions.

Thinking too little causes mind damage. On the other hand, exploring the deep recesses and dark corners of our mind, delving into the conscious and unconscious parts of the human psyche, continuous learning, and searching for answers that are slightly beyond our capacity—all expand the volume of our minds.

I’m often accused of thinking too much. In my opinion, there is no such thing as thinking too much; it would benefit our minds to THINK MORE.

Honoring Your Teacher

(Part of John Study)

“I glorified you on earth
By completing down to the last detail
What you assigned me to do.” (John 17:1-5 MSG)

How can we glorify God? First we have to figure out our specific assignment. Then we have to complete it down to the last detail. Sounds simple, right? I wish!

Yesterday, I was helping a student with her research paper. I felt like her paper was too long, and that it had too much irrelevant information. She insisted that her instructor wanted all the details that were mentioned during the lectures. I only had second-hand information about her assignment. There is no way that I could know all the details her instructor gave her in class.

We each have our specific assignment from our Instructor. Our tutors and mentors can help us to a certain level, but the only way to know all the details is for us to pay attention to our Teacher—write down all the instructions, take copious notes—whether it seems important or not. Then we have to actually sit down and do the work. We have to get away from all the distractions, as well as from other chores that are vying for our attention. We have to sort through all the information and figure out what is relevant to our particular assignment. Once we feel like we have finished our task, we need to go back over it again, check for mistakes, and complete every last detail. 

The goal is to complete the assignment to the Instructor’s satisfaction--not to our own. Our dedication and attention to detail is not merely for our own edification--it also brings honor and glory to the Teacher.

Weird Dream

We regularly attend a Catholic church. At the beginning of Mass, two attendants and a priest walk down the nave (the center aisle) to the altar. One attendant carries a cross, and the other carries a Bible. We don’t have any altar boys or girls at our church. Most of the time, I’ve noticed two women who volunteer for this task.

I had a weird dream early this morning. I dreamt that I walked into our church on a holiday, all dressed up in a skirt suit and a pair of fabulous high heel shoes. I was carrying a laptop case slung around one arm and a bulky DSLR camera on the other. (I warned you it was a weird dream…in reality I’ve never taken either to church!) As I enter the church, our parish priest comes up and asks me if I would be willing to carry either the cross or the Bible down the nave. I’m a little annoyed. Can’t he see that I have all this expensive electronics with me? I can’t just drop it somewhere and leave it unattended! But before I get a chance to protest out loud, he is walking me towards the other women who usually do this task. Then he adds: “You will have to change your shoes. These ladies will show you where we keep the special shoes that are worn for the procession.” I look down at their feet. These two ladies are wearing goofy, black flats with white gym socks! Are you kidding me! There is no way in hell I’m wearing those shoes! It would ruin my look! So, I turn around and tell the priest: “I’m sorry. I can’t do it. It’s not because of the shoes” (I’m lying… the shoes are the deal breaker.) “I would just be so nervous that I’m afraid I might trip and fall and drop the Bible or cross and make a scene. You better find someone else.” Thankfully, I woke up at this point of the dream.

It doesn’t take a genius to interpret my dream. I don’t want to put down my good life and lift up God’s Word and His Cross…and I definitely don’t want to look goofy. I make up all sorts of excuses that make no sense. (Like, “I might trip and fall in flats, so I think I’ll keep my high-heels on.”)

You would think that after a vivid dream like this I would be convicted to change my attitude. No…I just feel sad right now. I don’t really want to make any changes. I don’t want to give up what I have.

Sal Khan

Most of my heroes are already dead. Luckily, most of them are writers who have left detailed explanations of their thoughts and beliefs. There are a few non-writers that I admire, but they lived in extraordinary periods of history that drew out their greatness. That being said, there are a few contemporary heroes whom I find inspiring as well. Sal Khan is one of these heroes.

Salman "Sal" Khan (born October 11, 1976) is an Indo-Bangladeshi American educator, entrepreneur, and former hedge fund analyst. He is the founder of the Khan Academy, a free online education platform and nonprofit organization. From a small office in his home, Khan has produced more than 4,300 video lessons teaching a wide spectrum of academic subjects, mainly focusing on mathematics and the sciences. As of May 2013, the Khan Academy channel on YouTube attracted 1,233,000 subscribers and the Khan Academy videos have been viewed over 283 million times. In 2012, Time named Salman Khan in its annual list of the 100 most influential people in the world. Forbes magazine put Salman Khan on its cover with the story "$1 Trillion Opportunity". Salman Khan holds four degrees: a BS in mathematics, a BS in electrical engineering and computer science, as well as an MS in computer science from Massachusetts Institute of Technology, and an MBA from Harvard Business School. In late 2004, Khan began tutoring his cousin, Nadia, in mathematics over the internet using Yahoo!'s Doodle notepad. When other relatives and friends sought his tutoring, he decided it would be more practical and beneficial to distribute the tutorials on YouTube where he created an account on 16 November 2006. Their popularity on the video sharing website and the testimonials of appreciative students prompted Khan to quit his job as a hedge fund analyst in late 2009 to focus on developing his YouTube channel, Khan Academy, full-time with the aid of his long-time friend Josh Gefner. He delineated his motives: "With so little effort on my own part, I can empower an unlimited amount of people for all time. I can't imagine a better use of my time.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salman_Khan_(educator)

I consider Sal a friend even though he doesn’t know me. This is because Sal’s videos have helped me to homeschool my son. His familiar voice has explained everything from trigonometry to chemistry to my son over the last several years. Like me, Sal is an Indian-American. He is six years younger than I am, but I look up to him like I would an older brother. If I ever had a chance to have Sal over for coffee and biscotti, I would have so many questions to ask him: What did your mom say when you quit your high-profile job to make youtube videos full-time? Did anyone in the Indian community think you were wasting your talent and education? Was it difficult to sit in a walk-in closet, studying all these different subjects, so as to make these videos for strangers? Did you ever feel discouraged, lazy, bored, or insignificant? Sal’s been interviewed by many famous journalists, but none have asked him these particular questions.

There are many other altruistic, talented, and successful individuals in this world. Most of them remain largely unknown, leading inconspicuous lives dedicated to service. In general, certain cultures are more supportive of volunteerism, while others are more focused on education, professional development, and financial success. Sal Khan uses his talents to empower others, even though it means giving up some of his own power. His altruism extends beyond his family, ethnicity, religious beliefs, and nationality. I think another great Indian hero would have approved…

“Man becomes great exactly in the degree in which he works for the welfare of his fellow-men” (Mahatma Gandhi)

Coffee and Conversation

One of my favorite activities is to have coffee and conversation with interesting people. Jerry Seinfeld, the famous comedian, has a popular web-series called “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee.” In these short videos, Seinfeld rides around in classic cars with other comedians, stopping at coffee houses along the way. Their conversations are casual, interesting, and hilarious.

I’m not much into cars, but the rest of the show appeals to me. I really enjoy sitting face-to-face, with one other person and having a good conversation over coffee…oh, and some biscotti. I wouldn’t want to record it on video though, because that may inhibit an open, transparent conversation. I might share their story by writing about it later, since that allows me to change names and thus retain people’s privacy.

I think most people have something worthwhile to express, but only a few are candid enough to share anything beyond the superficial layers of their experiences. Others may want to open up but are not able to verbalize their feelings and opinions easily. Some people are so preoccupied with maintaining a certain image that they don’t want to express anything real.

There are several key ingredients to a good conversation: Shared interests, inspirational experiences, instructive advice—all freely expressed by two articulate, transparent individuals. A good conversation is a thing of beauty—similar to two equally-matched tennis players on a court, or two wonderful dancers on a stage. It can be exhilarating, mutually inspirational, and deeply satisfying.

Apoca-list

Last week, my family and I were discussing the following scenario: What if we knew that the world would end in 6 months—every living thing wiped out completely. What would you want to do before the world ended? My clever husband came up with a name for this bucket-list-before-the-apocalypse—‘The Apoca-list.’

Since last weekend, I’ve asked several people what would be on their apoca-list. Most included travel, having fun, spending time with loved ones, etc. The one thing I thought of was rather nerdy and corny. I was hesitant to mention it, even today at lunch with two good friends. I would like to know how to be with God and let everyone else know about it too. Now most religions have already come up with their own formulas on how to be with God in the after-life. Some believe that certain words have to be proclaimed. Others believe that certain ceremonies have to be performed. Some believe that entrance is based on good behavior. I don’t think any of us really know, even though some people have spent their lifetime trying to figure it out. I doubt that I will figure out the absolute truth either. So, maybe I should come up with a more doable apoca-list: go camping and kayaking, eat more junk food, spend as much time as possible with my husband, son, and friends…

However, I’m not ready to give up. Even though I may never discover the absolute truth, I have found encouraging clues that keep me seeking:

“And this is the real and eternal life:
That they know you,
The one and only true God,
And Jesus Christ, whom you sent.” (John 17:1-5 MSG)

Soaking Dishes

In our home, ‘soaking dishes’ is a delaying tactic. It’s a euphemism for “I don’t want to scrub this dish right now, and if I leave it in the sink, maybe someone else (usually mom) will wash it later.” It’s like when someone asks us to do something and we reply: “Let me think about it,”—we are usually postponing the decision till a later time.

I like to spend time reading, soaking, thinking, and writing. Since most of these tasks are inactive, I feel like a lazy bum, merely delaying ‘real work’. I usually feel guilty every time I sit still, especially during daylight hours, when I have energy. I measure the value of each day by the amount of physically active tasks I have done. If my work does not produce tangible results, if I don’t have anything to show for it, I feel useless—like I’ve just wasted time all day.

I recently read that one of my favorite philosophers, Henry David Thoreau, was considered ‘an irresponsible idler’ and ‘a loafer’ by his neighbors. (The Great Work of Your Life, by Stephen Cope)

Thoreau—an idle loafer! This made me laugh out loud! It also comforted me greatly. Thinking, ‘wool-gathering’, staring out the window—all might look and feel unproductive, but if it’s good enough for Thoreau…maybe it’s ok for me to spend a few hours a day…soaking—until the hard, stuck-on particles of experience and observation soften—making each lesson easier to deal with.    

Support Vehicles

RAGBRAI is a non-competitive bicycle ride across Iowa. For seven days every summer, small towns all across the state become hubs of activity as they host thousands of cyclists and their support teams. Although I’m impressed with anyone who can ride 472 miles over 7 consecutive days, I’m even more fascinated by those who volunteer to drive the support vehicles that enable these riders to reach their goal.

Support vehicles are packed with coolers full of drinks, snacks, camping supplies for overnight stays, bike repair equipment, and spare parts. The support driver will drive a different route ahead of the cyclist to a prearranged stopping place. I’ve heard it’s a logistical nightmare as thousands of vehicles are all trying to find alternate routes (since they are not allowed to drive on the same route as the cyclists). The driver has the boring tasks of loading and unloading tents, filling coolers full of ice, and restocking supplies. They meet the cyclists at their midday location to distribute food and drinks. They spend a lot of time waiting for the cyclists at each designated stop. RAGBRAI also has an official SAG wagon (Support and Gear wagon) that follows behind all the cyclists. If cyclists get too tired, or if their bikes break down, then the SAG driver will pick them up (along with their bikes) and take them to the next pit stop.

I wonder why some of us are content to play supporting roles. It might require less effort, but there is no sense of accomplishment at the end of the day. Volunteering for this role must be a labor of love. I wonder if any of the cyclists feel guilty about having someone else do all the schlepping, while they get all the glory. I wonder if knowing that they have a support driver helps these cyclists to focus and reach their goals.

Some days, I wish I had a SAG wagon following me around—carrying my burdens, while I ride unencumbered through life—someone to give me a lift when I’m sagging, and take me to the nearest place of rest—someone to provide me with refreshment and sustenance at the end of a long day.

Yet, most days, I find satisfaction in supporting my loved ones as they push ahead, riding toward their dreams. I wonder if this makes me an underachiever?

Solar-Powered

I think I might be solar-powered. I have so much more energy between sunrise and sunset. Unlike a solar-powered calculator, I don’t work well under artificial light. I need real sunshine. You would think I would prefer living closer to the equator where there is more year-round daylight. But if it’s too hot to go outside, then I can’t recharge. I don’t crave warmth as much as I do light. And on beautiful, sun-lit days, I can’t get enough of the outdoors.

While researching the subject of solar energy, I came across the curious concept of ‘right to light’ laws:

“For at least two thousand years, people have attempted to assign solar rights in a fair and efficient manner. Ancient Romans protected the right to solar heat and light through prescriptive easements, government allocations, and court decrees. Ancient Greeks protected solar rights through rigid land planning schemes that oriented streets and buildings to take advantage of light and passive solar heat. More recent rules − such as the so-called “ancient lights” rule established in medieval England or the permit system currently used by Japan − have continued to refine the concept of solar rights. Each regime has recognized that sunlight, in reaching any one parcel, may travel across multiple parcels, and its route may vary throughout the day and from day to day. By necessity, then, the creation of solar rights implicates the rights of neighbors, both immediate and further afield.” http://128.197.26.4/law/central/jd/organizations/journals/bulr/documents/BRONIN.pdf

Many ancient cultures, knowing the value of natural light, made laws protecting people’s right to light. You were not allowed to build your house in front of someone’s window, blocking their light.

In my search for illumination, I sometimes, unintentionally, block other people’s light. Writing and talking out loud enable me to process my thoughts. However, if in my pursuit of personal development, I hinder another person’s growth—then I’ve blocked their light. I have a right to build high-reaching towers on the space that I own, but not at the expense of others. My desire for enlightenment must not impede anyone else’s edification.

What NOT to Do

I’ve been seeking clarity about what to do in the next phase of life. I’m still undecided and confused. However, I have been getting a few clues on what NOT to do. As I try on different options, I realize some things are NOT a good fit for me:

-Things that take me away from home for too long. This is where all my favorite people live—my husband, my son, and my dog. It’s also where I do my favorite activities—take care of my loved ones, pray, write, and think. It’s where I store important tools that keep me functional--like books, comfort foods, running shoes, my bed, and all my kitchen utensils.

-Repetitive, mindless tasks. I want to do things that stimulate my mind and promote continuous learning. I easily get bored with unintellectual work.

-Any work that requires me to stay alert after sunset. I’m an early morning person. By late evening I run out of energy.

-Jobs that require manipulating the truth, making moral compromises, or squeezing a profit off the disadvantaged.

-Work that requires me to be quiet for very long—I need to express my thoughts, either by speaking or writing. I want to be able to connect with people.

-Tasks without a purpose—I have to feel like what I’m doing is meaningful and helpful.

-Things that make me feel incompetent—this would drain me quickly. I want to work within my skills and talents.

-Be in a toxic environment—surrounded by critical, unsupportive people or be part of a materialistic, profit-motivated group.

Ill-Fitting Shoes

I’m a petite woman with large feet. Yes, it’s an odd combination. When I’m buying a new pair of shoes, here are some things I look for:

1)    Do they make me look good?

2)    Are they versatile? Can I wear them with multiple outfits?

3)    Are they reasonably priced?

I have been known to buy shoes that ‘sort of fit’ as long as they meet the above criteria. Okay, so I know this is not the wisest way to pick shoes. You’d think I would learn from the calluses and achy feet. I really like high heel shoes, because they make me feel taller than I really am. I’ve adapted to the pain, accepting it as part of life—as I try to be something I’m not. I have shoes that rub me the wrong way, trip me up, make me lose my balance, or have little support. I continue wearing these ill-fitting shoes, because I’ve already paid for them, they can’t be returned, and I don’t want to admit that I’ve made a mistake by buying them.

Here are a few tips I read about new shoes: Feet expand from morning to evening. When buying shoes in the earlier part of the day, you have to allow room for this expansion. For those of us who have one foot that is slightly larger than the other, we have to buy the shoe that fits the larger foot. Shoes that look good are seldom comfortable. High heels are harmful for your feet. It’s not a good idea to take new shoes on a trip.

Unfortunately, I disregard every one of these rules! I buy shoes that make me look better even if they make me feel crummy.

 

I’ve also been known to take on ill-fitting roles that cause me pain, rub me the wrong way, and make me lose balance. I take on these responsibilities—partly because it’s expected of me, and also because I think that I can make it fit somehow. Maybe, if I wear it in, it’ll stretch out and fit someday. Or, if it’s too big, I can use a band-aid or an insert that will fill in the gaps. The timing might not be right, or the task might be incompatible with my personality. Maybe, as life progressed, I have expanded and outgrown certain undertakings that fit in the past. Yet, I continue walking in ill-matched roles, because failing to do so would make me look bad. Once I’ve made an investment of time and energy, I’m reluctant to give up. I develop a callused, blistered attitude and resign myself to plodding—awkwardly, miserably--through life.  

Complex Pleasures

They say that simple pleasures are always the best. Then why do most of us chase after the complicated pleasures of life? A home cooked meal of a few ingredients, walking the dog around your neighborhood, watching the birds at your birdfeeder, clean sheets on your bed, a hot shower, the scent of earth after a good rain, picking a tomato off a vine, singing to yourself, reading a good book, laughing with friends, watching your child eat, hugging your spouse…all score high on the pleasure scale. Yet, those who prefer these delights over more elaborate pursuits are deemed unsophisticated. Instead, those who travel to exotic locations, acquire possessions that nobody else has, dine at expensive, gourmet restaurants, and engage in activities that are limited to the privileged are held in much higher esteem. Exclusivity is mistakenly perceived as a magnifier of happiness. New experiences and sensations are valued over anything that seems commonplace. 

I have had the opportunity to experience both sides of the spectrum. I have traveled more than the average person. Seeing the great wonders of the world can be inspiring. Tasting native cuisines from different cultures can be intriguing. However, sitting down to dinner with my family on a daily basis enriches the quality of my life much more than any of these experiences.

Extravagant pleasures are more likely to leave you feeling restless and discontent, while simple tastes and uncomplicated desires lead to lasting fulfillment. The ability to find contentment in your daily routine is much more gratifying than the never-ending search for exciting experiences. In my experience, satisfaction is most often found close to home.

Novelty

Every so often, I crave a break from routine—something new, fresh and thus exciting. I search out a new recipe, a new restaurant, a new pair of shoes, or a new hobby. These changes are not necessarily an improvement over what I already have; they are merely different than the usual. They provide a distraction from monotony, a temporary pleasure, a tinge of happiness.

Part of the pleasure of going on vacation is to go somewhere new and to experience something different—the more uncommon the location, the better. Most tourist sites cater to this desire by offering bungee jumping, zip-lining, drinks in weirdly shaped vessels—anything that jolts you out of the ordinary. After a few days, the novelty wears off, and you need something fresh to bring the same level of pleasure. 

“Of all the passions of mankind, the love of novelty most rules the mind. In search of this, from realm to realm we roam. Our fleets come loaded with every folly home.” (Shelby Foote—Historian)

In our search for novelty, we distractedly roam away from discipline. Our preoccupation with trifling baubles diverts our attention away from that which is enduring and stable. We seem to be especially susceptible to chasing after amusing follies during transitional stages of our life. Teens are known for pursuing fads, and those in mid-life crave change in the form of plastic surgery, motorcycles, and sports cars.

“The delight of opening a new pursuit, or a new course of reading, imparts the vivacity and novelty of youth even to old age.” (Benjamin Disraeli)

‘A new course of reading’ seems rather tame compared to modern versions of frivolity. As I go through middle age, I am bound to chase after new forms of amusements that distract me from the reality of aging. If only I could manage to pick pursuits that somehow improve my life or that of others. If only I could stay away from predictable gimmicks and damaging diversions.

Roommates

It’s that time of year when college students are picking roommates. Finding the right person to share your living space is a lot like finding a short-term spouse. Most young people are more absorbed in their own concerns, desires, and feelings than those of others. How is this going to affect me, my future, and my popularity among my peers? Two or more self-centered individuals sharing a living space is a recipe for discord.

By the time we are ready for a spouse, we hope to find a mature individual who can admit: “It’s not all about me.” We want an ‘other-centered’ partner who is willing to revolve around us. Most of us settle for a world-centered spouse—someone who is willing to extend his/her boundaries beyond self-interest and include us, our children, our friends, and our worldly concerns.

Yet, there is an even better living arrangement.

“Live in me. Make your home in me just as I do in you.” (John 15:4 MSG)
“If you lived on the world’s terms, the world would love you as one of its own. But since I picked you to live on God’s terms and no longer on the world’s terms, the world is going to hate you. (John 15:18-19 MSG)

 

Jesus has asked us to move in with Him, to live a God-centered life. Living on God’s terms involves giving up living on our own terms and rejecting the world’s terms. This is not easy or fun. I can see why most of us are reluctant to be roommates with Jesus.

Caring about Consciousness

Some people are interested in attaining higher levels of consciousness, while some want nothing more than to enjoy this life and to be concerned about that which is material, tangible, and understandable. I can accept that we all care about different things. What I don’t get is how some people dismiss things that they don’t understand as insignificant or irrelevant. Take, for example, the commonly accepted myth that humans only use 10 percent of their brain. I did some online research and here is what I found:

“What's not understood is how clusters of neurons from the diverse regions of the brain collaborate to form consciousness. So far, there's no evidence that there is one site for consciousness, which leads experts to believe that it is truly a collective neural effort. Another mystery hidden within our crinkled cortices is that out of all the brain's cells, only 10 percent are neurons; the other 90 percent are glial cells, which encapsulate and support neurons, but whose function remains largely unknown. Ultimately, it's not that we use 10 percent of our brains, merely that we only understand about 10 percent of how it functions.”

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=people-only-use-10-percent-of-brain

Now, some of you will find this article fascinating, while others will have zoned out by the middle of the first sentence. Maybe you don’t care about neuroscience, but I doubt that you would say that human brain function is unimportant. We might only understand about 10 percent of the science behind our brains, but to assume that the parts that are beyond our comprehension are superfluous…well, that’s just plain stupid!

This attitude of—I don’t care about it and I don’t understand it, thus it must not be important—is prevalent in our culture. We have voters who don’t understand global economics or foreign policy and go on to assume that it is irrelevant. There are individuals who don’t care about environmental damage and pretend it doesn’t exist.

Thus, it’s no wonder that many people dismiss spirituality. Faith is difficult to prove, to understand, to explain, or to quantify. Thousands of people, including me, have tried to make sense of it. Yet, God will always remain beyond human comprehension. However, just because we can’t understand God completely, doesn’t mean He does not exist, or that connecting with Him is irrelevant. Whether we care about it or not, consciousness—the instinctual, intrinsic awareness of the bond between us and our Maker—is supremely important.

Art Appreciation

I took a music/art appreciation class in college which taught me how to distinguish between a Manet and a Monet. After taking this class, I could use artsy terms to pass myself off as a cultured individual. However, I don’t think my capacity to appreciate classical music or modern art increased significantly.

My teenage son thinks a certain musician is the greatest. Needless to say, the whole family is regularly exposed to this musician’s work, as well as to a steady commentary about his exceptional attributes. No matter how often I listen to this kind of music, it just sounds like noise to my ears. I must not have what it takes to appreciate this guy and his music. Most likely, I never will, because I don’t care enough about this kind of music.

I think one of my favorite authors is a genius. My son disagrees and says this author is overrated. What!?I have suggested that he spend some more time reading this author’s work before he makes up his mind. Maybe my son doesn’t have what it takes to appreciate this wonderful writer…and maybe he never will.

Just as we may have certain innate predilections for music, art, or math —I wonder if we are predisposed to have different spiritual aptitude levels. Maybe some of us will always remain in a semi-conscious state of faith. Even if we try to cultivate cognizance and acquire understanding, we may never be able to develop keen insights like Kierkegaard or C.S. Lewis. Some of us may never have what it takes to truly appreciate a certain wonderful Artist.  

Gangs in the Neighborhood

This summer, I have spent a lot of time dealing with gangs in my neighborhood. It all started a month ago when I put out some birdfeeders. I bought a beautiful gazebo birdfeeder that coordinated nicely with the exterior of my house, filled it with what the packaging assured me were seeds that a variety of birds would enjoy, and waited for a culturally diverse group to show up. Within a few days, a gang of sparrows monopolized my feeders, wasting all the seeds by sweeping them to the ground with their beaks and scaring all the other birds away. You wouldn’t think sparrows would be intimidating, but they are aggressive and act collectively to establish their territory. I observed them for a few weeks as they abused my magnanimous food distribution system. I wasn’t going to enable these unfair bullies to take over my front porch! 

So I did some research online and followed the recommendations for detracting sparrows and attracting other birds. I replaced one of the feeders with one specific for finches. I changed the kind of seed I used on my general feeder. Around my pretty gazebo feeder, I placed a halo made with wire hangers—strung with fishing line and weights (this is supposed to discourage sparrows but not other birds for some reason). I made a fence around the trough so the sparrows couldn’t sweep the food down with their beaks. My once pretty birdfeeder now resembles an inner city convenience store with bars, chains, barbed wire, and locks on everything. As of today, the sparrow gangs are still patrolling the feeders. The juveniles are the worst offenders. They have no fear. They don’t have enough common sense to know that their wings can get caught in the fishing line, or that their escape route is compromised by the wire halo. I have seen a few finches, but they are still scared to even visit their own feeder, since the sparrows are only a few feet away. I saw a grosbeak and a cardinal today...which gives me hope. I SHALL keep fighting for the underserved, for the marginalized, for the gang victims.

In case you’re wondering…Yes, there is a point to this tongue-in-cheek narrative about my birdfeeders. We start many service projects with good intentions. We want to help the poor, feed the hungry, and care for the weak and oppressed. We spend a lot of time and energy trying to ensure fair and equitable distribution. Yet there are always groups that abuse our generosity by milking the system and hogging all the resources. This leads us to feel disgusted, discouraged, and burnt out. We feel like we are merely wasting our time and money just encouraging the trouble-makers and bullies.

Most of us would prefer donating money to refugees and then not worry about whether we are inadvertently funding the warlords in the process. However, this kind of irresponsible generosity can cause more harm than good. I think a certain level of creative strategizing and critical thinking is required, even in charitable pursuits. In order to resolve societal problems, we must stay observant—identifying the conflicts and scrutinizing the weaknesses in our charitable ventures. We must adapt our techniques as we respond to the complexities that are bound to pop up. We must stay engaged, develop solutions, and outwit the bullies and gangsters.

Leftovers

I have such a hard time getting my family to finish leftover food. I cook regularly, and there are usually several dishes in the fridge on any given day. I try to push these dishes on my family, but they prefer new, freshly-prepared meals. The leftovers keep getting pushed to the back of the fridge till I finish them myself or give up on them and throw them away.

I have a bunch of leftover prayers that I’m not sure what to do with. Some prayers are answered quickly, while other ones are answered in surprisingly indirect ways. Yet there are some prayers that I have been pushing forward for so long, but God seems to have lost interest in. I feel hopeless and tempted to give up.

I’ve heard prayer described as ‘being conscious of God’s presence’ and ‘lifting mind and heart to God.’ My prayers are mostly pushing petitions up to God. I take my list of requests to the counter every day, in the hopes that if I am persistent and consistent—my prayers will be answered in the order in which they are received. Yes, I treat prayer as if it’s a customer service line!

This morning, I was feeling especially hopeless and dejected. I looked at all the leftover prayers. I sighed. I asked God: “What are we going to do about these?” I went for my run--which is what I do when I feel stuck.

Here are some thoughts that came to me: Lord, thank you for the progress—however miniscule. Each of these situations is a tiny bit better than they were a few months ago. I trust You to take care of these issues as you see fit. Transform my mind to adapt to whatever You have planned.

Providential Encounters

Sometimes, God makes such subtle moves that I almost miss them. The other day, I was having coffee with two good friends when a young woman, who went to school with our now grown children, walked past us. After a few polite pleasantries, she went and sat by herself to eat and read.

For the past few months, we had been discussing how to encourage and support young women pursuing their higher education. We all looked at each other, recognizing that her appearance at that restaurant might have been divinely-scheduled. We decided to ask her to join us ‘old ladies’ and tell us about her future plans and current schedule. She graciously came over to our table and chatted with us about her college classes, part-time job, hopes, and dreams.

There have been several such providential encounters that have changed the trajectory of my life: The chance meeting with the man who would one day become my husband; running into strangers who would later become my good friends and mentors; listening to a radio report which then led to 12 years of homeschooling; the completely random phone call that brought our dog to us and the cherished relationship with the family that gave her to us.

There have also been some detrimental encounters that have led to bad choices, mistakes, and pain. And I have missed several divine appointments because of self-absorption.

Prior experience has taught me to keep my senses tuned in. Every time I cross paths with someone, I treat it like I’m approaching a junction. I look both ways—up to Heaven and down to Earth. I ask God for directions on how to proceed.

Chicken Little

Chicken Little is a fairy-tale character who imagines the sky is falling when an acorn falls on his head. He runs around spreading panic and fear among all the other animals.

I must confess that I occasionally fall prey to the Chicken Little syndrome, described by John Landry as "inferring catastrophic conclusions possibly resulting in paralysis.” We are all aware that things are falling apart around us. This is not news. What we need is a Chicken with a plan on how to deal with entropy—a Chicken who is not overwhelmed, paranoid, or hysterical—a Chicken Peaceful perhaps?

Chicken Peaceful would notice the ominous signs, but instead of spreading fear, he might think: What can we do about this? What reasonable precautions can we take to protect ourselves and others from danger? I may be little, but I trust in a big God who is in control of everything. I shall stay calm and listen for further directions. I am confident that as long as I stay within God’s sphere of influence, obeying his instructions, I am safe.

“If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God, “I’ll get you out of any trouble. I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know and trust me. Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times;” (Psalm 91:14-16 MSG)

Sand Dollars

I’ve never found a sand dollar. Then again, I’ve never put much effort into looking for them. I’ve seen sand dollars that others have discovered—so I know they exist. Those who have found them say that one has to know where to look and when to look. When I walk on a beach, I walk on the dry sand where I find a lot of broken sea shells. I’ve been told that sand dollars are found at low tide on certain gently sloping beaches. You have to walk slowly, right at the edge—your feet can’t be on the dry sand, but partially immersed in the water. As soon as each wave recedes, search carefully and you may find the flat, circular outline of a sand dollar.

Sometimes, faith can be as elusive as a sand dollar. Discovering your faith requires intentional seeking. It isn’t something we stumble upon while strolling casually over dry sand. Those of us who are reluctant to get our feet wet might find a lot of broken sea shells (which are as common as broken churches). You have to search carefully—but your timing, location, and some divine guidance are all essential too.

“This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled them.” (John 6:65 NIV)

Faith is God-enabled. It is not something that we can will-power our way into. We can't just decide to study, pray, and try really hard to find faith. God reveals Himself to anyone who seeks sincerely—so it's not exclusive to any chosen group. However, those who have found faith can share their experience--which may enable others to discover their own faith.

Valued vs. Valuable

Last night, my husband and I had an interesting discussion about the difference between what is valued and what is valuable. 
 
Things that are valued are variable depending on the times and culture in which you live. At the present time, being tech savvy is more valued than the ability to grow food. Someone who develops an app for the Apple iPhone is considered more worthy than a farmer who grows real apples. Consumers prefer forms of entertainment that distract rather than inspire. Current music, books, movies, TV shows, sporting events, and leisure activities are appealing diversions, yet rarely influence deep thought or positive change. Leadership abilities are highly esteemed, while servant hearts are not. Ambition, acquisition, and accumulation are honored more than generosity, humility, and compassion.

Valuable characteristics are enduring and constant—sustaining and nurturing all of creation. Sunlight, clean water, fresh air, fertile soil, health, love, a sound mind, fairness, peace—these things have been cherished by every culture in every century. Timeless values are beneficial and all-encompassing—rarely profitable to one group while detrimental to another. 

When making any choice, when weighing any option, it might be helpful to distinguish between what is valued and what is truly valuable—between that which is temporary and that which is eternal.

More Feet Washing

Soon after the story about Mary washing the feet of Jesus comes the following:

Jesus “poured water into a basin and began to wash the feet of the disciples, drying them with his apron.” (John 13:3-6 MSG)

 “So if I, the Master and Teacher, washed your feet, you must now wash each other’s feet. I’ve laid down a pattern for you. What I’ve done, you do.” (John 13:12-17 MSG)

Somehow, reading these two accounts one after another made me wonder if there was any significance in this sequence.

Maybe because I’m a middle-aged woman, I no longer find romantic stories about young people all that inspiring. However, when I see a couple who have been married for several decades and are still obviously devoted to each other, I’m intrigued to hear their love story. I want to follow their pattern. I want what they have, so I’m willing to do what they do.

When we are involved in an intimate relationship with God, we realize that we are just responding to Someone who has been attending to us all along—Someone who cares much more about what is going on inside of us than on the outside. When we reciprocate this love, giving of ourselves, submitting, serving—this pattern of mutual devotion becomes an example for others—making them desire a similar rich, deep, sacramental relationship.

Rubbing His Feet

(Part of John study)
 

“Mary came in with a jar of very expensive aromatic oils, anointed and massaged Jesus’ feet, and then wiped them with her hair. The fragrance of the oils filled the house. Judas Iscariot, one of his disciples, even then getting ready to betray him, said, “Why wasn’t this oil sold and the money given to the poor?” (John 12:3-6 MSG)

Mary anointed and massaged the feet of Jesus. Judas thought this was a waste.

There are certain people and tasks that I want to take care of; and then there are other obligatory duties I know I should be doing…but really have no heart for. I feel sheepish about serving those I feel drawn to and chide myself over the responsibilities and burdens that I neglect. This leaves me feeling storm-tossed and conflicted. Yet, I also sense that this desire to care for this particular handful of individuals—this focused passion—is a gift that not everyone receives.

Have you ever done menial tasks for someone you love and the world thought you were wasting your potential? Do you feel drawn to a lowly, servile position—something as unimportant as massaging the feet of Jesus?

Rubbing someone’s feet is a very intimate task. Not everyone feels a longing for this level of intimacy. If you happen to be one of those few who have been blessed with this gift, do not take it for granted.

Sure, the world will see it as a waste of your talents and opportunities. Humans are impressed by grand projects that have a huge impact, bringing accolades and profit.

“When push came to shove they cared more for human approval than for God’s glory.” (John 12:43 MSG)

This is really the crux of the problem. Most of us care more about human approval than about honoring God. No matter how much we fight it, we keep making choices based on human standards. We cave in to seeking self-fulfillment rather than God’s glory.

Love One Another

If a hotel room or a restaurant is not up to my standards of cleanliness, then I just never patronize that establishment again. In fact, I steer clear of every business that is part of that chain. On the other hand, if my home is dirty, I clean it up. I don’t just avoid going to the parts of my house that are messy, (although I have been tempted to stay out of my teenager’s living space, since he actually has a biohazard sign on the door!)

“Now that you’ve cleaned up your lives by following the truth, love one another as if your lives depended on it.” (1 Peter 1:22-25 MSG)

This verse comes up right after the one from yesterday that reminds us how God is the one who got us out of the mess we were in. ‘Loving one another’ means entering into one another’s mess. This is a subject I’d rather not write about. I would much rather spend time out in nature by myself or with those I love and avoid chaotic environments.

Now, I’m all for helping friends or family members who are in need, but I if I meet a strange meth addict whose life is a hot mess—I walk away quickly in the opposite direction! Most of the time I can’t improve the situation, and all I end up doing is spreading the disease anyway. Or at least this is my excuse for avoiding certain kinds of people.

When Jesus commanded us to love one another, he didn’t just mean our friends and family. However, I don’t know how He expects us to get involved in every mess! Maybe, like hotel maids, we aren’t responsible for cleaning every room in the hotel, but only the ones we are assigned to. And maybe our assignments change regularly and we have to meet with our Supervisor to know what to get involved in each day.

Getting Away from the Herd

 “Your life is a journey you must travel with a deep consciousness of God. It cost God plenty to get you out of that dead-end, empty-headed life you grew up in.” (1 Peter. 1:18-21 MSG)

I spent so many decades of my life pursuing half-truths and my own moral compass. Like a recovering addict, I’m constantly tempted to fall back into this habit. When I’m around this sort of behavior—around those who “make a religion out of their own whims and lusts,”¹—I’m drawn into this darkness. The magnetic pull of worldliness overpowers my moral compass. I become disoriented, no longer sure of where true north is, and lose my way. Most recovering addicts try to stay away from environments that may trigger a relapse. Similarly, it’s best for me to steer clear of certain toxic environments.

I have found wonderful hiding places that allow me to get away from the herd—spaces in nature that call me to adore a power beyond worldly values, beyond my own whims and lusts, beyond the dead-end, empty-headed life I grew up in.   

¹(Jude 1:17-19 MSG)