Ambivert

I’ve taken several personality tests to see where I fall on the extrovert-introvert spectrum. I’m talkative, energetic, assertive, and expressive. I initiate eye contact, conversation, and friendships easily. Although I’m comfortable around people and enjoy spending time with close friends, I detest large groups, parties, and big cities. I find it easier to connect with people on a one-on-one basis. I dislike superficial chit-chat. However, if I have an opinion, I’m likely to express it even if it causes conflict. I don’t think before I speak; instead, I process my thoughts as I’m speaking or writing. My favorite activities are reading, thinking, writing, and being in nature. I’ve been told I’m overly analytical and risk-averse. I don’t like to multi-task, preferring to focus on one thing at a time.

I am what psychologists call an ambivert--one whose personality type is intermediate between extrovert and introvert. I prefer to think of myself as a deep-thinking extrovert, which sounds like an oxymoron. I like being around people, as long as it stimulates introspection. I find it mentally stimulating to discuss ideas with others and seek input from their life experiences. I also need daily quiet times of reflection to contemplate all that I’ve gathered and make sense of it.

This desire--to communicate with authentic, sincere people for part of the day and then retreat and be alone with my own thoughts-- is confusing to many of my friends and family members. For their sake, I wish I could be more of an introvert, to be a better listener, to not inundate them with my thoughts. I may not fit neatly into either the extrovert or introvert personality type, but I have come to accept this dichotomous contradiction within me.