Wise Friends

“Become wise by walking with the wise; hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces.” (Proverbs 13:20 MSG)

What are the top characteristics you look for in a friend? 

I asked this question to a few of my friends and family. Certain character traits came up frequently: loyal, honest, trustworthy, fun, encouraging, authentic, consistent, respectful, accepting, compassionate, non-judgmental, virtuous, transparent, empathic, communicative, etc.

I was surprised that no one mentioned ‘wisdom’ as one of their top criteria in friends. 

The book of Proverbs places a high value on wisdom. When we do life with those who have sound judgment, we are more likely to emulate them and learn to make good choices. In contrast, when we hang out with the unwise, our lives fall apart. Those who follow the short-sighted are often misguided. 

Perhaps you think of yourself as the wise one in your friendships. This means you have the responsibility of always being a good role model to those who may be following your example. Are you a good friend who practices the character traits that add value to the lives around you? Are you empowering your friends to heal and grow?

In most friendship groups, there are leaders and followers. I prefer friends who are dependable mentors.  I call these people frontline friends. Like frontline workers they are on the forefront of the battle, taking the brunt of the burden of figuring out how to progress.  They are steeped in wisdom and spiritual discernment. I am appreciative of their consistency and clarity. I continually lift them up in prayer.