“I'm proof - Public Sinner Number One - of someone who could never have made it apart from sheer mercy. And now he shows me off - evidence of his endless patience - to those who are right on the edge of trusting him forever.” (1 Timothy 1:16 MSG)
Most people who only knew me in my younger days would be surprised at the person I have become. As a young woman, I was ambitious, prideful, and self-absorbed. I was determined to get my way and yielded to no one. I measured the worth of a person based on worldly standards. It took a few decades and a lot of life experiences...but I have changed. The primary reason for my metamorphosis: the sheer grace and mercy of God. Without this, every blessing could have made me arrogant, and every tragedy could have turned me bitter.
How far have I come? After years of timidity, I have entered the pool of faith. I have gotten wet. I am neck deep, but still holding on to the edge, afraid to let go completely. I am still learning to trust. God, in his infinite compassion, patiently calls me out into the deep. He uses my life as evidence of HIS transformative power. Those who are right on the outer edge of trusting God are watching...whether I am willing to leave the shallow end, whether I swim or sink.
Letting go of the edge for the first time and trusting that God has your best interests at heart and does listen is like riding a bike for the first time. When whoever is holding the seat for you so that you don't fall over and you are finally able to ride without tipping over is a feeling you never forget. From that moment on you will always trust you have it in you to do so at any given moment. Let go and let God.
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