The Value of Rejection

“The rejection will force honesty, as God reveals who they really are.” (Luke 2:35 MSG)

When was the last time you felt rejected? Has someone felt rejected by you recently?

My husband and I were considering buying a new piece of land. The selling price was higher than what we were willing to pay, so we decided not to purchase the property. We had nothing against the seller; he seemed like a great guy. It’s just that our desire for what he was offering was not that high.  I wonder if he felt rejected.

This year, my garden produced more peppers than I can use. I have been giving away my extra peppers to anyone who will take them. Many of my friends have passed on my offer. Should I feel personally rejected when someone rebuffs my offer?

It is much easier to accept rejection from strangers than from family and friends. Our identities are wrapped up in pleasing and being accepted by those close to us. We want them to accept and appreciate what we have to offer. In turn, we feel compelled to pick up whatever they are placing in front of us--whether it be advice, opinions, expectations, labels, or criticism.  Everything is taken personally. If our loved ones are unhappy, we feel responsible.

Rejection is a lot like seeing a ‘Road Closed’ sign as we are cruising down the highway. It forces us to stop. This can be disappointing, because it causes us to lose our momentum. However, there is some value in rejection. It reveals truths about the rejectors as well as the rejectees. It allows us to reevaluate our ideas as well as the expectations of others. It makes us take a closer look at our perceptions. It clarifies our desires and how much we are willing to give. It compels us to be honest with ourselves.

Lord, grant us the wisdom to separate our intrinsic value from the worthiness of what we offer.