Compassion Quota

“God told Moses, "I'm in charge of mercy. I'm in charge of compassion." (Romans 9:15 MSG)

Compassion allows us to be empathetic. Mercy prods us to alleviate suffering. Some are blessed with an unlimited supply of  these gifts, while others are not. When it comes to compassion and mercy, I have a tipping point. There is a limit to what I will tolerate. Once someone has crossed their allotment, I can’t seem to muster any more empathy.  There are exceptions--God has given me the grace to feel unconditional love and compassion for my husband and son. This gives me hope that, through divine intervention, I will eventually develop a more merciful perspective toward others as well.

According to my sister, compassion is a lot like flexibility. Some are naturally more pliable, while others have to work at it. Even if you master certain yoga positions, it doesn’t mean you can do every kind of move. Each joint, muscle, and ligament has to be stretched gently and regularly in order to increase flexibility.

Forgiveness is an essential part of compassion; thus, I have been working on being more lenient. However, I am finding that forgiveness alone is not enough; forbearance, the ability to patiently endure continual provocation, is also needed. To me, forbearance feels a lot like permissiveness, enabling co-dependence and abuse. Thus, this step is extremely difficult for me.

I realize that my compassion quota system is not ideal. It reveals rigidity and self-righteousness. I will continue to practice--to bend, to stretch, to reach, and to yield. I will not be able to do this on my own. God is in charge of compassion and mercy. I will ask Him to train me.

Lord, help me to develop a compassionate heart and a merciful perspective.