Maintaining Boundaries

In our neighborhood, most of the homes are on one acre plots. Most of the neighbors don’t have fences around their property, because it is too costly. There are fence posts at the back corners that demarcate the end of property lines. Most of us are careful about respecting each other’s boundaries even though they are invisible. The neighborhood dogs occasionally trespass across other yards and make messes, but they are animals and don’t know any better.

It is important to have healthy boundaries in our physical and spiritual lives. For example, we have to set limits for ourselves on how much we eat, how much we spend, the people we hang out with, the environment we stay in, and how we use our time, talent, and energy. The animal side of us may chafe at these limitations, but our spiritual side knows better. We also have to set boundaries for others on how far they can impose their will on us. However, it is inevitable that some people will trespass against our boundaries. We must forgive them, but we must still let them know where our personal boundaries are.

Creating boundary lines is, in itself, difficult. Yet maintaining and enforcing them are even harder. Confronting a loved one who has crossed into unhealthy territory is very uncomfortable. It’s almost easier to just ignore it and accept it. We shrug our shoulders and say to ourselves, “They just don’t know better; I’ll just have to learn to live with it.” It takes so much energy to enforce limits. Plus, it makes us feel selfish and causes us to question our love.

When we fail to enforce boundaries, it creates confusion and disorder in our world. Mayhem and turmoil are a breeding ground for evil. Nothing good ever comes of it. Thus, enforcing boundaries is an essential technique in the fight between good and evil.