As an American citizen, wife, mother, friend,
daughter, sister, tax-payer—I can claim certain rights and privileges. However,
this sense of entitlement can be toxic to my growth, as well as to my
relationships with others.
For example, as a taxpaying American citizen, I have
certain inalienable rights under the U.S. Constitution. Most of the time, I
take these rights for granted. I have never sent a thank-you note to the U.S.
government for providing me with great roads, the right to vote, freedom of
speech, food and water, safety, etc. My attitude is that I deserve these
things. Now, if one of these things were taken away, the government would hear
from me post haste! I’d be writing
letters and signing petitions.
A sense of entitlement saps gratitude. It is
difficult to be appreciative when we think we are just getting back what we are
owed.
I have done so
much for my _________ (spouse, child, friend, sister, brother, daughter,
son, coworker, employer, neighbor); I’m
entitled to be repaid for my kindness. In fact, whatever they do will never be
enough, since they will always be indebted to me.
I have worked
really hard for my _____ (job, money, education,
accomplishments, possessions); I deserve
unlimited happiness.
It can be physically and emotionally exhausting to
help someone who feels a sense of entitlement. Very few of us can continually
serve in situations where we feel unappreciated. Obligatory relationships drain
affection, respect, generosity, and compassion. Similarly, it is impossible to
find contentment when you think you deserve happiness.
“Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of
himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that
he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what.” (Phil 2:5
MSG)
May we imitate Christ by cultivating a sense of
gratitude, grace, humility, generosity, and wonder. May we receive with thankfulness and share
without expectations.
