Connecting

I have trouble connecting with people in a large group setting. I much prefer one-on-one relationships, to ask personal questions, to listen for what’s left unsaid. It’s also interesting to meet families, one at a time—to understand the dynamics between spouses and their young children. Once you throw in extended families, adult children, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances together, then the melodrama eclipses any authenticity.

Maybe this is why I have such a difficult time with fellowship in church. Churches have too many people for my taste. I feel like a spectator observing a drama. Most of the time, I feel like such a hypocrite when I go to receive communion, since I don’t feel like I’m connecting with God or anyone else in that building.

Early this morning, I had communion. There was no bread, no wine, and there were no people. I wasn’t in a church. I was at home, sitting in my favorite chair, sipping a cup of coffee, and reading a book. For a few moments I felt intimately connected to God.

 “We saw it, we heard it, and now we’re telling you so you can experience it along with us, this experience of communion with the Father and his Son, Jesus Christ. Our motive for writing is simply this: We want you to enjoy this, too.” (1 John 1:3-4 MSG)