About six years ago, I had this urge to make some monumental changes in my life. I hatched a plan that seemed good to me. I knew the rest of the family would have to make some adjustments to accommodate my ambitions, but I decided it would be a good growth opportunity for them as well as me.
I have several wise friends, and I’m in the habit of running everything by them. So, as usual, I decided to divulge my excellent idea to a close friend and mentor. I remember we were sitting in the front seat of my car when I laid out my plan to her. She listened carefully while I prattled on excitedly. Once I was finished, she said something like--I don’t think it’s a good idea right now. She went on to explain her reasons. They made sense. However, I was a bit disappointed. I thought she would go along with me and rubber stamp my plans. Instead, she had the sincerity to tell me what I didn’t want to hear at that time. This is the sign of a true friend.
Not many of us would be willing to take the risk that she did. Even when we are uncomfortable with a friend’s choices, we rarely speak up. It’s much more pleasant to be a cheerleader than a voice of reason. We enjoy encouraging others, but we hold back words of warning. Our desire to be liked by our friends outweighs our concern for their welfare. We don’t want to be known as the one who holds back anyone from reaching for their dreams.
I’m really glad this friend didn’t hold back her input. She took a risk and stuck her neck out. I grudgingly listened to her advice. It changed the trajectory of my family’s life.
“The right word at the right time
is like a custom-made piece of jewelry,
And a wise friend’s timely reprimand
is like a gold ring slipped on your finger.”
(Proverbs 25:11-12 MSG)
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